The Golf Widow

By Shannon M. Kirkland

The Carter Seagrove Book Boutique Edition

Text Copyright© 2014

Shannon M. Kirkland

All Rights Reserved

Contents

Dedications

Acknowledgements

Chapter 1 – Mike

Chapter 2 - Eddie

Chapter 3 – Mike

Chapter 4 – Eddie

Chapter 5 – Mike

Chapter 6 – Eddie

Chapter 7 – Mike

Chapter 8 – Eddie

Chapter 9 – Mike

Chapter 10 – Eddie

Chapter 11 – Mike

Chapter 12 – Eddie

Chapter 13 – Mike

Chapter 14 – Eddie

Epilogue

About the Author

Dedications

To Alp Mortal, who advised me to simply start writing when I'd mentioned that I'd always thought about writing my own story. Without your encouragement and faith in me, I never would have started. Your advice and continued encouragement along the way kept me motivated and helped bring this story to life.

To Charlie, who was my inspiration for the ideas in this story. Your love, generosity, intelligence and boundless energy never fail to amaze me. I am and will eternally remain grateful for the peace and the joy that you have brought into my life. Sweetheart, this story is for you.

Acknowledgements

A special thank you to my dear friend, Brandi, for helping me change some awkward wording and pointing out typos prior to being edited.

Thank you to Alp Mortal for editing this story. Any errors remaining would strictly be my own stubborn refusal to change something!  His own writing is simply amazing and I encourage readers to check out his website and The Carter Seagrove Project which is a creative workspace and place for artistic collaboration that is co-authored with another awesome author, Chambers Mars.

Chapter 1 – Mike

“Bye, Mike. See you tomorrow!” Christie yelled in at me as I was washing the dishes from the breakfast which I’d made. Before I could reply, I heard the front door slam, her car starting up and the noise of the engine fading away as she pulled out of the driveway.

Frowning down at the soapy water, I let out a sigh. She was gone again and I was left home alone for the weekend once more. It’s not that I wasn’t happy that she’d found something she loved to do; it’s just that now she was rarely home. “It’s not that you can’t go out and find something to do on your own,” I said to myself, feeling a little guilty for my uncharitable thoughts.

Sadie ran into the kitchen wagging her tail, looking up at me and no doubt hoping I would drop something good to eat. “There’s my little baby girl; you’re not going to run off and leave Daddy are you?” Realizing that she wasn’t getting anything out of me except baby talk, she walked over and plopped herself down on the rug by the back door, still keeping an eye on me just in case I did something interesting.

As I finished up the dishes, I thought about my situation. I really did need to start getting out of the house and finding activities that I would enjoy. Christie and I used to do everything together and now all she wanted to do was play golf. She’d become obsessed with it after playing with one of her friends and had soon started taking lessons. She spent every chance she got practicing and playing and even started entering in some tournaments. She was a natural at it and was determined to lower her handicap and compete in the U.S. Woman’s Mid-Amateur.

As I walked back through our rooms gathering up our dirty laundry, I reminisced about how we’d met. It had been on the first day of orientation at college. Back then I was this tall, rather gangly kid, scared to death at the prospect of starting my first day and feeling totally out of my element. Christie had stumbled into me, started to fall and I’d caught her. She’d laughed up at me, slightly embarrassed and from then on we became instant friends.

The remembrance of those early years made me smile as I sorted our laundry, careful to turn everything right side out to make sure nothing colored ended up in the whites. I didn’t want a repeat of the pink underwear fiasco. Why she couldn’t take a minute to separate her clothes before throwing them into the clothes hamper, I had no idea.

Thinking back to how nervous I was about going to college and the fact that I did it anyway gave me a surge of pride. I had been bound and determined to get my degree and nothing, not even my anxiety about meeting and talking to people, was going to keep me from it. I hadn’t wanted to end up like my father, an overworked bitter man who worked night and day and still couldn’t get ahead. Back then I was overworked too, doing my schoolwork at home and taking care of my mother day and night. Being alone with only my mom and my books to keep me company was how I’d spent most of childhood and teenage years. In college, I would’ve spent every waking hour in class or in the computer lab if it hadn’t been for Christie.

After tossing a load of clothes in the washer, I pulled the vacuum cleaner out of the closet. Sadie hated the thing and every time it came out of the closet, she would bark at it and then run to the safety of her dog bed. As I vacuumed the carpets, I thought more about how I really needed to find something else to do. Working, reading books and taking care of the house really wasn’t much of a life.

Christie had tried to get me to play golf with her. It was such a tediously boring game. I’d rather have played tennis like we used to back in college. She’d even convinced me to go with her to one of her tournaments. That was a completely miserable experience hanging out with the other spouses while she had a great time playing on the course. They were mostly women and kept trying to talk to me and I didn’t have a clue what to talk about. Talking about my job as a computer programmer had their eyes glazing over, prompting me to quickly shut up.

It had always been that way. I’d get nervous about what to say and instantly start talking about my job. That was one place where I felt the most comfortable. Everyone there called me Computer Mike and they didn’t care what I said as long as I kept their programs running and coded up any enhancements that they’d asked for.

Christie had made it easy for me. When we went out, I could simply let her take over and lead the conversations. She could talk to anyone and was never anxious about it like I was. She was my social life and we used to spend almost every evening together after work. I’d make dinner and we’d talk about our day then she’d usually watch television while I was reading or on the computer. That had changed after she’d started playing golf; now I usually only had Sadie to eat dinner with and she isn’t much of a conversationalist.

Sadie jumped out of her bed when she saw me put the vacuum cleaner away and as I made my way into the living room, she ran ahead of me. She always had to be wherever I was and would try to anticipate where I would go next, running ahead, looking back over her shoulder to make sure I was following her. Sometimes, just for grins, I would dash into a different room and she would come back looking at me as if to ask what I was doing. God, I love that little dog.

Sitting down on the sofa, taking a break from my chores, I picked up the latest novel in the Alex Cross series. I started to open it but then sat it back down. I couldn’t keep doing this. I couldn’t spend another Saturday cleaning and then reading in between tasks. I had to get out of here and just do something. Even if I started with something small, that would be better than nothing. Maybe I could go into town and go to that little coffee shop that Christie and I used to go to every Saturday morning.

Before I could change my mind, I jumped up, went into the laundry room to toss the clothes into the dryer, ran back to my office to grab my backpack, stuffing my book into it as I walked back through the living room then I said goodbye to Sadie and headed out of the front door.

***

Parking up outside of Perkfections, I took a deep breath. “This is no big deal, people do it all time,” I said out loud. Garnering my courage, I exited the car, walked into the coffee shop and ordered an Americano. Realizing that breakfast was hours ago, I grabbed a tray and picked out one of the pre-made sandwiches to go with the coffee.

After my order was up, I stopped to top it off with cream, grabbed some napkins and headed outside to find a table. “That wasn’t so bad,” I mused as I sat down, throwing my backpack into the other chair. I dug out my Patterson and started to read as I ate my sandwich.

A few minutes later, hearing a noise, I glanced up. A guy was setting his computer down on the table next to mine. When he looked up, I felt a jolt of recognition. He was shorter than me, slim with a wiry build, sporting short blond hair. Although not classically handsome, there was something simply eye-catching about his features. His face was somewhat sharpish with a long aquiline nose and the most amazingly beautiful big brown eyes framed by thick dark lashes. He smiled, revealing slightly crooked teeth which gave him a rather impish look. The smile seemed to light up his entire face and I returned it then quickly looked back down at my book.

Puzzling over where I may have seen him before, I wasn’t really reading it. I was aware of every noise he made as he sat down and fired up his computer. He took a sip of his coffee and then a few minutes later, I could hear the clicking of the keyboard. I thought about asking his name and starting a conversation but he did seem rather busy.

Hearing a pause in the typing and some rustling, I glanced back up as he was pulling a pack of cigarettes and a lighter from the pocket of his jeans. “This won’t bother you, will it?” he asked, shaking one out of the pack and putting it to his lips.

“Be my guest; I’ll be having one as soon as I finish this,” I replied, gesturing to my sandwich.

“You never know, anymore; what with all the uproar about second-hand smoke.”

His voice was deeper than I’d expected and he had a slight northern accent.

“True,” I replied, starting to feel the nerves kick in.

“I don’t think I’ve seen you here before,” he said, blowing out smoke with a look of complete ecstasy on his face.

“It’s been awhile.” Feeling the need to explain myself, I added, “I’m a bit of a homebody …”

He had this slow, almost indolent, way about him as he crossed his legs, leaning back in his chair, blowing his smoke casually up in the air yet there seemed to be a barely concealed energy buzzing under the surface.

He continued to smoke while I focused on eating, racking my brain for something else to say. I started slightly when he asked, “So what do you do that keeps you at home all of the time?”

I explained that I did actually have a job as a computer programmer and was feeling embarrassed that I’d called myself a homebody. Isn’t that something an old person would say? He didn’t seem to mind and smiled at me encouragingly as I told him about my job.

“When I’m not on the computer, I usually have my nose stuck in a book. Like this series,” I said, gesturing to the Patterson, “I’m addicted, although to be honest, it’s gotten a bit predictable but I keep hoping the next one will be better. Of course, waiting for the next release to come out is always a pain.”

“I know what you mean. I was reading that series but got busy with something else. I think the last one I read was Cross Fire.”

From then on the conversation started flowing and I began to relax. Books are something I love talking about and it made me wonder why I hadn’t thought of it before as a conversation starter. Christie rarely read and if she did, it was always Chic Lit. The conversation was lively as we dissected the series, talking about our favorites, the characters and the plots.

“My name’s Eddie Carter, by the way.”

“Mine’s Mike ... Mike Adams. Nice to meet you, Eddie.”

Just when he was about to say something else, Christie’s friend, Sheila, and her husband walked past, heading into the candy store beside the coffee shop. As soon as she saw me sitting there, she halted and walked over.

“Mike? What are you doing here? Where’s Christie? I thought she was going to a tournament this weekend?” She looked around as if Christie would magically appear out of nowhere. I was annoyed at the interruption because once Sheila started talking, she never seemed to be able to stop.

“She is. She’ll be back tomorrow night if you want to give her a call.” I was hoping she would take the hint and leave but of course she didn’t.

“Oh, so what are you doing out? I thought Christie kept you at home all of the time. My name’s Sheila by the way,” she said, looking over at Eddie. “I’m a friend of Mike’s wife. And you are?” she asked, sticking out her hand.

“I’m Eddie,” he replied, shaking her hand.

And yes, there was a God because her husband grabbed her elbow and told her they needed to go. I’d met him once before but couldn’t remember his name.

“It was nice to meet you, Eddie. Tell Christie I’ll call her later, Mike.”

I watched them walk away and returned my attention to Eddie.

“Sorry about that. So you were getting ready to say?”

“Oh, nothing really,” he replied, looking at his watch. He stood up, closing his laptop, putting it in his computer bag and turned to go into Perkfections. “I’ve got to get to work. I come in a little early to relax before my shift starts.”

“Oh, you work here?”

“Yeah, part time,” he replied. “It was nice to meet you, Mike.”

“It was nice to meet you too, Eddie.”

As he sauntered in, I watched his retreating form and wished he’d been able to stay out here and talk longer.

After finishing my sandwich, I sipped the rest of my coffee while enjoying a cigarette. It wasn’t something I did that much but I did enjoy one with my morning coffee and usually after eating. Christie always gives shit me about it, particularly in light of my how my mother had died, so it was always a guilty pleasure.

Finished with my smoke, I stowed the book into my bag. Well at least I got out, had a coffee and met someone.

Picking up my tray and carrying it back in, I hoped to see Eddie again but he must have been in the back room. I left and headed over to the u-pick farm. Freshly picked vegetables were always better than the ones purchased at the grocery store plus – I reminded myself - I needed the exercise and the sunshine.

Chapter 2 - Eddie

Walking home from work, I was feeling thankful that it took less than five minutes to get there. It’d been a longer shift than I’d expected since Mary had called in sick. Pausing to check my mailbox before heading up the flight of stairs to my apartment, I smiled at Mrs. Green as she passed me on her way out. She barely acknowledged me but I shrugged it off. The old biddy had developed an attitude towards me after I’d accidentally dropped that book in front of her. The title and the cover made it obvious that it was a gay story. Whatever! Some people are just judgmental and nothing I can say or do will change their minds. It’s their problem, not mine.

It was just junk mail today which I tossed in the trash before heading up the stairs. I thought about that guy, Mike, who I’d met earlier today. Damn, he was sexy. Jet black hair, piercing blue eyes, and what a body! Broad shoulders, narrow waist and long muscular legs.

Feeling my dick give a little twitch, I laughed at myself. Yeah, right, the dude was married. No way am I going there again. Pulling out my keys and unlocking the door, I walked in, toeing off my shoes, padding into the kitchen to grab a bottle of water out of the fridge. Grimacing at the pitiful amount of food in it, I decided to forgo dinner and walked into the living room, plopping myself down on the sectional, swinging my computer bag up beside me.

I pulled out my laptop and plugged in, opening it up to the last sentence I’d written. I could have written more on the story before work but had actually gone inside earlier than I’d had to. I guess it was the disappointment of finding out that Mike was married. Not only was he hot, he’d been a lot of fun to talk to. I’d definitely gotten mixed signals from him so it had come as a bit of a shock.

Damn, why did the hot ones have to be hetero? What a waste! I laughed, remembering how I’ve heard the very same thing from girls commenting on the fact that I am gay. Still, he was one sexy guy. I turned my attention back to the computer and opened up my website to blog the details of my next release. I hoped Danielle got it back to me soon. Editors! Can’t live with ‘em and can’t live without ‘em!

***

Lying in bed after putting in a couple hours on my latest story, my mind drifted back to Mike. When we’d first started talking, he’d seemed shy and a little ill at ease which was in direct contrast to his looks. Most guys who looked like him were full of themselves and exuded an overblown confidence. He seemed slightly vulnerable and really sweet. I wondered if he was happily married.

I knew I shouldn’t even contemplate that but I couldn’t help but to remember how attractive he was. My first glance at him had caused my heart to pound and picturing him now sent the blood racing to my cock. With his thick dark hair, he probably had a mass of it on his chest. I love a man with a hairy muscular chest. I could just imagine how good it would feel to rub my cheek against it, seeking out his nipples, swirling my tongue around the proud little buds only then to kiss and bite my way down his treasure trail. I’d checked out his rather sizable package as we’d talked and now I wondered if his cock was natural. Peter’s was cut and had actually looked rather deformed. No, I’m not going to think of him right now, the fucker!

Grabbing my quickly swelling dick, I returned to my images of Mike. Drawing my knees up, planting my feet firmly on the bed, I rocked my hips, sliding my dick up through my fist. Rhythmically clenching and releasing my hole with each thrust, I imagined his big cock stretching and filling me. He would look good on top of me too; that big man riding my dick. I sped up, stroking it faster and harder, switching to a vision of him fucking my mouth with his big cock. Feeling my balls tighten up, I envisioned his plump ass in front of my face and burying my tongue in his tight puckered hole. I shot my load and it jetted out, landing on my neck with subsequent pulses spattering on my chest. I kept milking it, picturing Mike sucking out the last drop, until I couldn’t stand it anymore.

I sunk back down on the bed, shuddering, feeling so relaxed that it was tempting to just let myself drift off to sleep but I dragged myself up and into the bathroom. As I washed off my cum, I saw myself in the mirror. “Fuck, you know better than to fantasize about married men.”

Walking back into the bedroom and plopping myself back down in the bed, I remembered the sickening feeling when I’d realized that Peter didn’t really love me and would never leave his wife.

It had been over a year ago since we’d met. I’d spent several years traveling, working as an auditor and had taken a permanent position at a firm in New York. I was so ready to settle down and find someone to share my life with. I’d gone out to a local pub with my co-workers on a Friday night and the entire time I was exchanging glances with Peter. After my friends left, he came over and struck up a conversation. We ended up back at my place and spent the weekend together, barely leaving the bed.

It wasn’t until the Sunday when I’d asked him when we would see each other again that he confessed that he had a wife and two kids. He told me it wasn’t a happy marriage and we’d made plans to hook up again the next weekend.

He lived in upstate New York and travelled for work so it was easy for him to make excuses to the family about where he was. We caught time together when we could and I was always so eager to see him. I’d felt a little guilty for carrying on an affair with a married man but he was the one cheating, I’d rationalized. I’d assumed that he was working out how to get a divorce and the logistics of taking care of the kids.

I was crazy about him and I really thought he could be the one. We’d talked sometimes about his home life but looking back, I realized how vague he had been when it had come to actually saying that he was getting a divorce.

I’ll never forget that moment when my world fell apart. We were lying in bed in post orgasmic bliss and I’d turned to him, telling him that I loved him and asked him to move in with me. Peter had looked surprised at my declaration and said that while he liked me and it was fun, he would never leave his wife for me.

I remembered that feeling as if it had happened yesterday. My face had frozen and my throat had locked up and I’d barely managed to expel the words to tell him that he should just go home to her and not bother coming back. He never said a word; he just got up, dressed and left. When I’d heard the click of the door, I’d instantly felt sick and ran to the bathroom where I’d emptied the contents of my stomach.

I’d made my way back to my bedroom and as soon as I’d walked in the doorway and saw the rumpled sheets, I’d collapsed, sliding down the wall, crying so hard that I’d hugged my arms around myself as if trying to hold myself together to keep my body from flying apart along with my heart.

I’d never felt so heartsick before in my life and it had taken months to get over him. I’d vowed to never again get involved with a married man. There was no way I was going to allow myself to suffer that heartache a second time.

“Mike was just a jack off fantasy anyway; I’ll probably never see him again,” I reassured myself.

Chapter 3 – Mike

When I arrived back home, Sadie was overjoyed to see me. I let her out and started washing and putting the vegetables away. Nibbling on some of the food as I prepped it, I was feeling good about my little excursion. I’d gotten out, soaked up some sun, met someone and had a really nice conversation.

As I thought more about Eddie, I concluded that I’d never met him before. If I had, I’d definitely have remembered his voice; it was deep and melodic with a soothing timbre and I could have listened to him talk for hours. It was interesting to watch the animated expressions on his face and the energy he exuded as we started talking about the books. I was surprised at how insightful he was. He’d mentioned something that I’d never realized about Cross Country.

Sadie interrupted my musings, scratching at the back door. I let her back in and fixed her dinner, skipping cooking anything for myself already full from the vegetables I’d eaten. After cleaning up from her dinner and playing with her out in the yard, we settled down on the couch. She snuggled up beside me while I finished Cross My Heart.

***

“Gonna cum,” I mumbled, my lips barely moving; the voice sounding like it came from underwater. My body spasmed as the waves of pleasure overtook me, then the sensation of cum jetting into my briefs caused me to jerk awake. “Uhn,” I groaned, still grappling helplessly with my orgasm as the last contraction ejected the final spurt. Instinctively, my hand went down to my dick. “What the hell?” I thought, finally waking up and feeling the hot stickiness through my briefs and on my skin. I laid there for a moment, feeling sated and tried to recall the dream. My hands on smooth skin caressing a rounded ass, a weight on me, pressed flatly against my chest.

“That’s weird,” I said to myself as I jumped up, walking into the bathroom and stripping off my briefs. I hadn’t had a wet dream since I was a teen. I was trying to remember if it’d been awhile since I’d jerked off. I don’t really have much of a sex drive but every once in a while, my dick reminds me that it’s in need of some attention. It was always pretty much a clinical procedure and I generally did it in the shower.

I grabbed a washcloth and cleaned up, yawning as I grabbed clean briefs from my dresser. As I got back into bed, I heard Sadie’s little footsteps as she came running and jumped up beside me. I hadn’t even realized she’d gotten down and hadn’t remembered seeing her there when I woke up. I wondered if she’d gotten up because my dream had disturbed her. She settled back into her place by my thigh and we both drifted back off to sleep.

***

“Hey, you’re back! What can I get you today?” the cashier asked as I approached the counter at Perkfections.

“A Grande Café Latte and one of those apple pastries,” I replied, pointing to the case and feeling much more confident than I had the previous day.

After I paid for my order and grabbed some napkins, I made my way outside and chose the table I’d sat at yesterday. I’d gotten up this morning, finished the laundry and cleaned the bathrooms. I’d started re-reading an old favorite by Fredrick Forsythe and not wanting to spend the entire day at home, I’d decided to go back to the coffee shop. Yesterday had gone well and even if I didn’t see Eddie again today at least I was getting out of the house.

I was deeply engrossed in The Day Of The Jackal when I heard his voice.

“Hey Mike, you’re back!”

“Hi, Eddie,” I replied, looking up from my book and over at him. He was wearing a dark brown tee shirt with a faded logo on the front. The color contrasted nicely with the blond of his hair and accented his dark brown eyes. “They make much better coffee here than I can brew at home.”

“You’re absolutely right about that. My day doesn’t start out right until I’ve had a cup of good coffee,” he replied, setting his computer bag on the table next to mine. “I’ll be right back.”

“Okay, I’ll be right here.” I smiled and he flashed me one back before he sauntered into the shop.

He had a graceful almost lioness-like stride. I could picture him stalking his prey, all slow and easy until that energy rushed up and he went in for the kill. I chuckled to myself at the image of his brown eyes flashing but I couldn’t picture him hurting anything. I sat my book down on the table and as I finished the last bite of my pastry and took a sip of coffee, I momentarily panicked, wondering what I would say when he came back.

I didn’t have to wait long. I heard the door open and glanced back over, watching as he strolled back to the table with a large coffee in his hand.

“You finished the Patterson?” he asked, looking over at my book then setting the cup down and ferreting in his bag, bringing out his laptop.

“Yeah, I finished it last night. I picked this one out this morning, not sure what I wanted to start on next. I don’t know how many times I’ve read it but I love the flowing language and it has to be one of the best thrillers I’ve ever read. It makes Patterson’s work seem like child’s play in comparison.”

“I’ve read that one. He does a great job at painting the picture, building up the suspense and each of the characters seem to come to life. It has to be one of his best works.”

We both lit up a smoke, talking about the story, the setting in France and discussed how many of the characters were based on actual people and the plot which was modelled on actual events. We theorized about how it must have been in the 1960’s, living in France, not knowing if a civil war would break out. Then we moved on to talk about the OAS, the Secret Army Organization, which had plotted to murder the French President, Charles de Gaulle, staging an unsuccessful coup in Algiers. They had continued attempts on his life, terrorizing the nation until their subsequent capture. It was so much fun talking to someone who obviously enjoyed books as much as I did. By the time the conversation on the story had wound down, I’d finished my coffee and needed to take a leak, so I excused myself.

“I could use one myself,” he replied, getting up and walking in with me. There were a couple of urinals in the bathroom along with two stalls and double sinks. I don’t know what prompted me to do it but I took an impulsive peak at his penis while we were urinating. I couldn’t see much except the pink head in that brief glance, his graceful fingers gripped around it as he directed his aim. I hurriedly averted my eyes, turning my attention back to my own stream, feeling a blush light up my cheeks. Giving my dick a quick shake, I tucked it back in, zipped up and went over to wash my hands.

“I’m going to grab another cup and I’ll meet you outside,” I told him, feeling a little embarrassed, hoping he hadn’t noticed.

“Okay,” he replied casually, giving me a curious look.

“Oh shit,” I thought, “he did notice.” But I quickly forgot about the incident as I went up to get another a coffee; an Americano this time, needing something not as sweet as the latte.

When I walked back out, he had his computer open and the screen was opened up to Google Chrome. A page was loading as I walked past and sat down. I wasn’t sure if we would continue our conversation or if he was going to continue on with his browsing.

“So how long have you lived here?” he asked, turning his attention back to me.

“It’s been quite a few years. Christie and I moved here right after we graduated college. It’s a nice little town and I got a great deal on the house. It’s in the perfect location; close to everything but on a dead end street. It backs up to the State Forestry so we don’t have any close neighbors. How about you?”

He told me he’d only been here six months and how his friend Eric, who owned the coffee shop, had convinced him to move down from New York. I was getting ready to ask him about living in New York and what he did there when the cashier popped her head out of the door and called him inside.

I got up to empty my ashtray and grabbed his on the way by, seeing an Amazon page opened on his laptop. I wiped out the ashtrays and when I returned his to the table, I noticed he had a book pulled up, Out of the Shadows by Gray Wilson. Just as I was starting to read the description, the door opened and he walked out.

“You like this author? I’ve been looking for someone new to read,” I told him, nodding to the screen. As he walked over, I sat back down, placing my ashtray on the table.

“Yeah, I do like him,” he replied with a grin, “that’s the first book in the series, you should try it out. I have to go into work. I wasn’t supposed to work today but now one of Mary’s kids is sick; must be a flu bug going around.” He shut his laptop, stowing it in the bag, slinging it over his shoulder and picked up his cigarettes and lighter, stuffing them into his pocket. He picked up his cup and motioned to my plate. “You want me to take that in for you?

“Sure, thanks.”

I handed him my plate and before he walked in he said, “It was nice talking to you again today, I hope you come back.”

“I enjoyed it too. Maybe I’ll pop in for lunch one day this week otherwise it’ll be next Saturday.”

“I’ll be here, either inside working or out here. See you later.”

“Yeah, see ya.”

I looked back down at my book and my barely touched coffee. Having really only bought the coffee to prolong our conversation, I decided that I may as well leave since I needed to go to the grocery store on my way home. I stuffed the book in my backpack and went back to my car, feeling strangely abandoned.

Chapter 4 – Eddie

After tossing my bag in Eric’s office, I headed out front, stopping to wash my hands. The after church crowd was just starting to arrive. Eric ran a very successfully business here since he provided a nice range of sandwiches either pre-made or made to order, salads and a selection of soups.

“I’ll take over, Carrie; go take your break.”

“Thanks, Eddie, you’re a lifesaver. I need to go kick my feet up for a while.”

I worked by rote, having been at it for the past six months. As I took and filled the orders, I reflected on my conversation with Mike. He enjoyed analyzing books as much I did and had brought up some really interesting points. I felt a little bad about not telling him that my pseudonym is Gray Wilson and that the series features gay characters. I guess he would find out soon enough if he started reading them. I don’t know if I did it simply because it would be interesting to get his unbiased opinion or if I was just being a dick. I’d almost forgotten that he was married until he brought up Christie again. It seemed like I’d just kept getting mixed signals from him again today.

I had to wonder if perhaps it was just wishful thinking. He just had such a refreshing honesty and innocence about him. So often the guys I meet are too busy trying to impress and it’s just a stupid game where the winners get laid and the losers go home to jack off and plot out their next strategy.

Mike reminded me of the innocence of my youth. I smiled fondly at the memory of Shane. He was my first love from high school and we’d gone to college together. Truthfully, we were much too young when we’d made that decision. By the last year of college, we were at each other’s throats all of the time. It was hard for us to admit that we just weren’t right for each other but we finally did before what little love we’d had left was completely destroyed.

After we’d separated, I’d gone wild. There were so many different men and so many experiences to be had. It was a lot of fun during the first couple of years but it started to feel like being in a candy shop and sampling so many different flavors that eventually I couldn’t distinguish one from the next. Ultimately, it just made me sick.

The real turning point had come when I started writing. There was something about putting myself into my character’s shoes which made me realize just how soulless it all was. I was definitely ripe for the picking when Peter came along. I was longing for a deep and meaningful relationship and I wanted it so much that I was blind to the truth about him. In retrospect, I think all of those times we were apart I had created this fictional character for Peter that existed only in my mind. I don’t think I ever really knew him. It occurred to me that it could have been the fantasy of the relationship being shattered that had broken my heart and not simply his rejection.

I thought about Mike again and whether he would come back. It would definitely be much easier just to put him out of my mind if he didn’t but there was this part of me that was hoping that he would.

Chapter 5 – Mike

On my way home from the store, I thought about Eddie again and our conversation this morning. It had been thoroughly enjoyable and I found myself wishing that we'd had longer to talk. I’d even been thinking about him while I was doing the shopping. A couple of times, I caught myself wondering what kind of food he liked to eat.

It would be nice to have a male friend; someone to do things with. I wondered if he played tennis and found myself getting excited about the thought of us out on the court, pounding the ball back and forth. I really enjoyed it when Christie and I used to play together although she usually called time-out fairly quickly because I usually kicked her ass.

My mind drifted to what I was going to do when I got home.  I glanced at the clock on the dashboard and realized that it was later than I’d thought. Still, I doubted Christie would be home yet and I'd have to lug all of these groceries in by myself. Not a big deal but it was always nice when she helped. I could be putting them away while she brought them in.

Thinking about what I'd picked up and what I was going to make with it, I remembered that I’d thought about taking a gourmet cooking class but had never looked into it any further. It would be a good step towards getting out and I'd probably learn a thing or two in the process. Energized by the thought, I pulled into the driveway and hit the garage door opener, seeing Christie's car parked inside.

As I got out, I could hear Sadie barking inside and then saw Christie as she opened the door and popped her head out. She saw me opening the trunk and, guessing that I had groceries, came out to help.

"You're home early," I said. "How was the tournament?"

"Becky showed up again and managed to beat me by one stroke. I swear she finds out about every tournament I’m in and has to sign up for it. I think she has a vendetta against me. I'll beat her next time."

I gave her a sympathetic smile as I handed her a few bags, picking up as many as I could carry before following her in.

"Oh, Mike, you are not going to believe this. I was talking to Jason Jones; do you remember him? Anyway, he was telling me about Vision 54; it’s this training center in Scottsdale, Arizona. It’s owned by Pia Nilsson and Lynn Marriott. I was reading about them in Golf Digest which ranked them as the top two female instructors in the US. In fact, Pia trained Annika Sörenstam and she’s the top winning female golfer; she’s won over 90 professional tournaments. Jason knows them personally and is putting in a word for me to see if they will take me on for additional one-on-one training. I could end up hitting the big time. Imagine that Mike! Me playing as a pro one of these days!”

Nodding and smiling along with her excitement, we walked in and set the bags on the counter. I started digging into them and putting things away.

"That sounds great! Hey, there's a couple more bags still out there, do you mind grabbing them? Oh, and the eggs are in the front seat," I called after her as she headed out.

"So what do you think, Mike?" she asked as she bounced back in, setting the bags down and taking a seat opposite me on one of the barstools.

"It sounds like a great opportunity, Christie. How long would you be gone?"

"Gone? Honey, I'm talking about moving out there. We could get another house. Maybe even just put this one up for rent. I know there are a ton of programming jobs anywhere you go, so you wouldn't have any trouble finding another job."

"Moving? Seriously, Christie? Moving?"

Her smile faded and she became serious. "Yeah, Mike, moving. It would be a great opportunity for me."

Knowing that she was serious, I felt my heart sink. "I don't know. You'd still be gone all of the time and I would have to get a job in a town that I know nothing about. You know how hard it is for me …"

"I know, honey, and I had a feeling you wouldn't be too keen on the idea. It's … well … we knew it would come to this at some point. It's not like we're a real couple, are we?"

I knew what she meant. It was true that we were married and lived together but some fumbling around one night and our disastrous attempt on our wedding night didn’t really constitute a romantic relationship.

"Let's talk about it over dinner," I suggested. "You look all sweaty and tired. Go take a shower and I'll get supper ready."

She agreed and headed back to her room. As I started on our dinner, I thought back to the events leading up to our marriage. We were both approaching graduation within days, me with a computer science degree and her with a degree in nursing. We were both nervous about our futures and wondering where we would each end up.

We didn't often drink but that night we did. We cried on each other’s shoulders as we talked about the prospect of possibly living in different places, how we'd eventually find other friends and possibly even spouses and how it would never be the same between us. I don't know which one of us started it but we were both kissing and making out. Neither of us had a clue about what we were doing but it felt good so we continued. She stopped when I started to unbuckle her jeans and reach inside. "We can't, Mike," she'd said, “you know I'm saving myself for marriage."

We'd stopped and the next day when we met back up, we were both a little embarrassed. We loved each other but we'd never gone beyond hugs and a kiss on the cheek. Frankly, I'd never even thought about kissing her before that night and I don't think she'd thought about kissing me either. We didn't mention it again and the morning after our graduation ceremony, we’d flown out to Las Vegas for a real holiday.

We had a great time. We met a couple, Justin and Jennifer, and they just assumed we were a couple too. We spent the next several days together, going to the shows, out to eat and playing on the slot machines. On the next to the last day of our vacation, we’d let our hair down and had a few drinks, excited about our winning streak. “We're getting married,” Justin had exclaimed. Christie and Jennifer hugged each other and started excitedly talking about their plans. I shook Justin's hand and congratulated him. He was a decent guy and Jennifer was really sweet.

“Why don't we do it together?” Jennifer had asked. I’d looked at Christie and she was looking back at me with an expression that told me she was open to the idea. Thinking back to our make-out session less than a week before, I’d thought, "Why not?" I think Christie was thinking the same thing. We already knew we loved each other and that we really wanted to stay together. This would make things much easier. In a flurry of excitement, we all went down to the courthouse, got our marriage licenses and then went to the Little White Chapel. Within a few hours, it was all over and we came back to the hotel and celebrated with champagne.

That night we went back to my room after Christie had grabbed a few things from hers. Despite still buzzing from the champagne we'd drunk, we were both a little nervous. Justin had bought a big box of condoms and he'd handed me a few, telling me that I had to try them because they were super thin, lubricated and ‘ribbed for her pleasure’ he'd gleefully added. I was embarrassed because I hadn't even thought about needing condoms but it made sense, seeing as Christy was a virgin too, she’d have had no reason to be on the pill.

After brushing our teeth and changing, we'd climbed in the bed. We started making out again but it felt different to when we'd done it before. She'd pulled off her clothes and I'd shucked mine after we’d gotten under the covers. The overhead lights were out but the room was lit by the kaleidoscope of brightly colored lights from the casino sign, coming in from the window. I had to keep jacking my dick to keep it up and finally she screwed her eyes shut and told me to just do it. I put the condom on, crawled between her thighs and as soon she’d lifted her legs, I slammed into her. She screamed and I stopped, looking down at her to see if she was okay. We waited for a minute and she told me to go ahead.

Awkwardly, I thrust into her and for me it felt pretty good as long as I didn't look down at her face. It just felt strange, like I was doing something wrong every time I saw her grimace. So I braced my weight and stared at the reflection of the lights on the wall. It didn't take much longer for me to cum. I leaned down and gave her a quick kiss on the lips and asked her if she was okay. She just nodded and I pulled out, immediately heading for the bathroom to get rid of the condom. As I took it off, I noticed the blood and panicked for a minute until I remembered that it was normal for a virgin to bleed the first time. I wetted a washrag and took it back in, gently cleaning her up. It reminded me of all the times that I'd had to take care of my mother.

When I got back into bed, she'd already fallen asleep. The next morning, I woke up feeling the covers being pulled off and my dick being fondled. Peeking down, I saw her curiously examining it. It felt good so I just closed my eyes and let her continue. Then I felt a warm wet feeling and peeking down again, saw that she had her mouth on me. This only lasted a few minutes and when she stopped, I opened my eyes. She had a strange expression on her face like she'd just taken a bite of something she didn't like. Before I could say anything, she grabbed one of the condoms from the bedside table, opened it up and rolled it on me. She got on top, straddling me and sank down onto my dick. I closed my eyes while she rode me for a few minutes and then she leaned down and kissed me. It's not that it was all bad but it still felt strange and my dick started to wither. She stopped and leaned up looking down at me and said, "This is just too weird, isn't it?" She got off and lay down beside me and started to cry. I reached out and hugged her, telling her it would be okay. When she’d calmed down, we talked and concluded it was because we just loved each other too much as friends to have sex. The fact that we were married was actually a good thing because we could live together now. We could just wait and see if anything changed between us.

As I was getting ready to carry the food into the dining room, Christie walked into the kitchen.

"Good timing," I said, smiling at her. Her hair was all wet and she looked really cute with her girl next door look and I wondered again why I couldn't feel differently about her. We'd broached the subject once again after I'd bought this house from the proceeds of my parents’ property and we'd started our new jobs. But we still agreed it was just too weird and we were each free to look for other partners. I'd never met a girl I was interested in and used my marriage as an excuse the few times I’d been hit on. Christie hadn't met anyone either and I think she used the same excuse when it happened to her.

We carried the food in and sat down to eat. Sadie was in the kitchen gobbling down her dinner. I'd spent too many nights eating at mom's bedside and liked the formality of setting the table and enjoying our meal together. I always insisted that we had dinner in the dining room when Christie was home. Sometimes we'd eat outside on the patio table, especially if I’d cooked on the grill. A less formal affair but it still felt like a family eating together. Sadie wasn't allowed to beg but I think Christie slipped her some food sometimes so she was difficult to keep out of the dining room once she was finished with her own meal.

We delayed the conversation about moving and just chatted about her game. She told me more about her conversation with Jason. I couldn’t place him so she reminded me of his party when we'd met and that led us to reminiscing and laughing about how I’d hidden out in the library at his house during the party. I told her about going to the coffee shop and meeting Eddie and how much fun we’d had talking about books. She was happy that I’d gotten out of the house but seemed a little preoccupied.

After we'd finished eating, I took Sadie outside and had a smoke while she ran around in the yard. We came back in and I cleared off the table and washed up the dishes while Sadie lay in her customary spot on the rug, watching me. When I’d finished, I walked in the living room to find Christie on the couch with her laptop on her lap. I sat down beside her so that she could show me the information she’d looked up about Scottsdale.

I sat there looking over at her screen, petting Sadie while Christie talked about what she’d found but when she started doing more searches, I became restless. Walking back to the pantry, I retrieved the duster and began dusting the furniture as I listened to her talk.

"Sit down, Mike," Christie scolded, "I don't see a speck of dust anywhere."

She was probably right. I had already dusted and polished the furniture on Friday night. She always laughed at my meticulous cleaning. It was a habit I’d acquired during the time when I'd taken care of mom. The doctor had suggested that keeping a sterile environment would help so I did everything I could to keep the house clean and free of germs.

In the end, nothing I did had helped and she'd spent her last few years basically in a medically induced coma. My father's insurance wouldn't pay for her to stay in a facility and I knew that she wouldn't want strangers taking care of her anyway. Because of my outstanding performance in school and despite being absent so much, the school allowed me to take home courses. I still graduated with my class although I didn't know any of my fellow students. Some were recognizable from when I'd been in classes with them years before. But even then, I didn't spend much time with anyone since I was always worried about mom. She'd had good spells when her cancer briefly went into remission but it just kept coming back. The last time it had come back the doctor had given up hope and keeping her comfortable was the best I could do.

Mom had passed away just months before my high school graduation ceremony and my father insisted that we go. I guess he was proud of me since he’d dropped out of school although I'd never known him to be proud of me before. All I'd ever heard from him was a gruff thanks for dinner occasionally but mostly I got criticism for acting too girly and not being a big tough man like him.

Sometimes I wished he'd seen me after I had matured. I must have been a late bloomer because it wasn't until I was about twenty that I started bulking up and filling out. I shot up a couple more inches and with lifting weights in our exercise room in the dorms, I got to be almost as big as him.

"Are you okay, Mike?” Christie asked.

She could always read me like a book and knew when I was upset. I was so glad that she'd been there when the call came about my father during my sophomore year. He’d had a heart attack and had died instantly. She was by my side the entire time, helping me with the arrangements, packing up the house and putting it up for sale. She was a rock at a time when I'd needed her the most. I don't think I could have done it without her. She was as wonderful a friend then as she was now. I didn't know how to take this news.

"I’m fine. It’s just that this is a really big change and I’m not sure what I want to do," I replied, slumping back down onto the couch.

"I know and I hope this isn't too stressful on you, honey, but I really think this is my chance. You know, maybe I could just move out there, get an apartment and we can see how it goes. You could always move out there later."

She yawned, stood up and stretched. "I'm exhausted, I'm going to bed." She leaned over and gave me a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek. "Goodnight, sweetie, and just think about it but don't stress. It'll all work out."

I sat there for a few minutes after she'd left and I just didn't want to deal with this right now. I wasn't sleepy yet, so I went into my office to grab my Kindle before heading to my room. I shucked off my clothes and got into bed. Sadie, having anticipating my move, had already jumped in and was waiting for me.

I fired up the Kindle and searched for Out of the Shadows. When it came up, I clicked the Buy icon and settled in to read for a while with Sadie snuggled up by my side.

***

On my way to work, I kept yawning. I’d stayed up way too late, reading Out of the Shadows. It was a crime thriller about two detectives hunting down a serial killer. I knew I should have stopped sooner but I just had to find out what happened; it was a very compelling read. I was shocked at the conclusion and had totally guessed wrong about the killer’s identity.

I thought about the two main characters, Kyle and Andy. At first I was surprised because not only were they partners on the force, they were both gay and attracted to one another. While there were definitely sparks between them, the story primarily focused on the action so it wasn’t that much different to any of the other thrillers I’d read. I really liked how different they were from each other and how their individual talents complemented each other.

Kyle was the outgoing kickass front man, confronting the suspects and witnesses while Andy was more laid back. He was subtle and cunning, playing off of Kyle’s blatant aggression. Together their different personalities gave them an advantage and spending so much time together helped them to piece together the clues. The story was extremely well written and I felt as if I was in the middle of the action the entire time. I couldn’t wait to read the next book in the series and had downloaded it before I had finally fallen asleep.

My mind turned to Christie and I just didn’t know what to do. She was really excited about moving to Scottsdale. The inheritance she’d recently received from an aunt had set her up so that she could do whatever she wanted to do now. I had some of my own money put away so I could take plenty of time to find another job. But maybe it wouldn’t be a bad idea to live by myself for a while. I felt like I hid behind her as if she was the aggressive front man like Kyle. Unfortunately I wasn’t exactly cunning like Andy; I was just a boring computer geek without a life.

Chapter 6 – Eddie

“Eric, how was the vacation?” He looked as if he’d spent the entire time in Florida out on the beach. He sashayed up, giving me a big hug and a kiss on the lips.

“Marvelous, darling. You should’ve come with. You wouldn’t believe all the hot bodies on the beach. Everywhere I looked nothing but men, muscles and glorious cocks. It was paradise!”

“You say that about everywhere you go. Just how much time did you spend on that beach, ogling the goods?” I teased him. “Your tan looks great!”

“I always look great and you know it,” he replied, sweeping his hand down his body and giving me his signature pouty lip look.

I laughed at his theatrics. “Well, let’s sit down. You’ll have to tell me all about these cocks. Lord knows it’s been long enough since I’ve seen one besides my own.

“And it’s a marvelous one, darling,” he winked at me as we sat down.

I laughed at him again, shaking my head. We’d been friends since we’d met when I was working up in Toronto. He always flirted with me but I knew it wasn’t serious. He preferred more husky men than my compact frame promised and truth be told, so did I.

“So give me all the deets,” I said, leaning in conspiringly.

“Honey, you’re not going to believe this one!”

Eric told me one wild story after the next. No doubt with quite a few exaggerations but it was fun to hear about his hook-ups. His adventures kind of made me miss those days when I acted wild and crazy but I wasn’t ready to go back to nights of meaningless fucks, dashed hopes and disappointments.

“So what about you, darling? Did you meet Mr. Right while I was gone?”

“Well ...” I hesitated for moment, not sure if I should mention Mike.

“Come on, spill,” Eric encouraged.

“I did meet a guy yesterday morning; he came into the shop ...”

“So, what’s the deal?”

“The deal is he’s married ... to a woman!”

“No fucking way! Damn, Eddie, didn’t you learn your lesson last time?”

“We didn’t hook up or anything; we’ve just talked a couple of times.”

“Just talked? That sounds boring. At least tell me he’s hot!”

“He certainly is,” I admitted, “but there’s a lot more to him than that. I felt like we really clicked, like he’s someone I could really talk to and enjoy being with.”

“Did you try to make a move on him?”

“Oh, no ... he seems rather vulnerable and innocent. He’s got this shy way of looking down and the most adorable blush. Besides, I’m not even sure if he’s bi.”

“But I thought you liked your men to be assertive? You know, take control, throw you down and fuck you into oblivion. Oh, yeah, I’ll take that anytime,” Eric said with a salacious grin.

“I like assertive men but it doesn't have to be with an asshole that has absolutely no respect for me. Peter didn't and the more I think about it, the more I realize that we had nothing in common. He’d get bored and restless when I was writing and all he wanted to do was fuck. I want someone to share everything with; someone who loves me as much as I love them.”

“You're such a romantic, sweetheart. Won't being with one man get old? I like my variety!”

“I’ve had variety and that got old. Don’t you ever want a deeper connection? One where after the sex you still feel connected by this invisible bond of love, honesty, respect and admiration; and at the end of the day, you can’t wait to see them just to tell them how much you love them.”

Eric shifted uncomfortably in his chair. “I’ve thought about it but does love like that really exist?”

“I think it does but it’s a matter of trust and honesty and finding someone that has the same values and similar interest. Someone who knows who they are and the love they give to you is freely given; not with expectations and hidden agendas.”

“But doesn’t everyone expect something from each other? It’s always about me using him and him using me.”

I pondered that a moment. “It’s true that there is always a give and take in any relationship but I think the difference, Eric, is that each person must have an inner peace and what they give to each other simply makes them stronger together. I think that was the problem with my first boyfriend. We didn’t know who we really were then and we looked to each other to fill the void. No one can do that; it has to come from within. We just ended up frustrated and angry because neither of us could give the other what they really needed.”

“I see what you mean,” Eddie replied thoughtfully. “Do you think this Mike guy knows who he is? It seems like people who are shy are just looking to cling onto your confidence and they suck the energy out of you with their neediness.”

“I don’t know. On one hand, he seemed rather confident in himself especially when we were talking about the books we had read and when he talked about his job. On the other hand, he seemed like he still hadn’t found himself. It’s a puzzle really and one I’d like to solve but I still don’t know if he was actually interested in me or not.”

“So you will be seeing him again then?”

“He said he may come in for lunch one day this week and he’d be back next Saturday. I’m not really sure how I feel about seeing him again. If it turns out that he just wants to be friends then I don’t know if I can handle that. He would be so easy to fall in love with and I don’t relish the thought of loving someone that way, knowing that they would never feel the same way about me. If he is interested in me and wants more, then there is the fact that he’s married ... I’m not going through that again.”

Eric yawned and then moved to get up. “Just be careful, Eddie; I don’t want to see you broken up like you were after Peter. I’m exhausted and I still need to deal with some paperwork. See you tomorrow?”

“Sure. I have a shift from 2 ‘til 4. I’ll see you then,” I replied, standing up and giving him a hug goodbye.

“Goodnight, darling,” he said as we parted. Then he patted me on the ass saying, “You sure you don’t want to give us a try?”

I turned around in surprise and he was grinning.

“Eric, you’re so full of it; didn’t you get enough in Florida?”

“Never enough,” he replied with a wink.

I shook my head at him and left. As I was walking home, it occurred to me that it would never be enough for him, not until he found someone with whom he could share more than just his body.

Chapter 7 – Mike

Arriving home after an exhausting day at work, I was greeted by Sadie who was dragging her toy monkey; her entire body wiggling with excitement. I reached down and gave her some lovings, tugging at her toy between scratches.

“Mike? I’m in the kitchen,” Christie yelled out.

I walked in and saw that she had gotten takeout from China Palace. Not having to cook on a Monday night was a treat.

“This looks great, Christie; what’s the occasion?”

“Ha! Like it has to be an occasion for me to get dinner?”

We joked around while I made Sadie’s dinner and Christie set the table. While we ate, she started talking about Scottsdale again.

“Jason called and he’s flying out to Scottsdale tomorrow for a few days and asked me if I wanted to go. He said he could introduce me to Pia and Lynn. I thought I would look around while I was out there and set something up. I know this is short notice but their next camp starts in a couple of weeks. Have you thought about what you want to do?”

I had thought about it all day and had been dreading this conversation.

“I have, Christie, and to be honest, I think it may be time for us to venture out on our own. It’s not that I haven’t loved living with you but seeing how happy you are by finding something that you love has made me realize how I’ve just been drifting along. I need to get out, find my own interests and get over my ridiculous phobias. Sure, I’ll never be the life of a party but you know how I am. Besides going to the store and work, I never do anything on my own. Do you know, I was actually nervous when I went into Perkfections the other day. How crazy is that?”

“Mike! Quit being so hard on yourself. You’re not crazy; you’re just shy and have a little social anxiety. It’s perfectly understandable considering how you grew up.”

“Okay, I’ll give you that but isn’t it about time that I did grow up? I’ve been burying my head in the sand and avoiding anything uncomfortable. I was just thinking this morning how it’s like I’ve hidden behind you. Remember how nervous I was when we met? I was practically shaking in my shoes-”

“But, Mike, you did okay ... look how much better you are now than you were back then.”

“That’s true but it’s only because I’m with you ... I need to try this on my own. I need to figure out who I am on my own.”

Christie sighed and then went silent for a moment. I hoped she understood and that I hadn’t hurt her feelings. Sadie ran into the room so I got up and let her out and when I came back to the table, Christie looked ready to talk.

“You know, Mike, you are absolutely right. Not just about you but about me too. You claim that you’ve been hiding behind me but I’ve been doing the same with you. Okay, not exactly the same,” she amended when she saw me start to object. “I don’t have your anxiety about meeting and talking to people but I certainly do when it comes to thinking about dating someone. I’m still not ready to think about it and playing golf keeps me too busy right now anyway.”

“Don’t even mention dating! That’s not going to happen to me for a long time. I’ve never even seen a woman in whom I was interested in enough to contemplate that!”

Christie laughed at my horrified expression and said she felt the same about guys. We cleared the table and I went outside to have a smoke while Sadie played around in the yard. We came back in and while I washed the few dishes from our meal, Christie called Jason back.

“He must have been optimistic about my going with him; he’d already bought my ticket,” Christie said, walking back into the kitchen.

“Do you need me to help you pack?”

“No, it’s just a few days; we’ll be back on Thursday night.”

She went off to pack and I walked into my office, checked my email and then grabbed my Kindle to sit down and read for a while.

***

Wednesday morning and I was at work, blankly staring at my computer. For the past two nights I had stayed up entirely too late, reading about Kyle and Andy. If I ever thought I’d been addicted to Patterson’s series then I don’t know what I would call this obsession with Gray Wilson’s.

I wished that I’d brought my Kindle in with me today but I knew if I had, I wouldn’t get any work done, not that I’d accomplished much so far this morning. I wanted to finish this latest book and it was driving me mad, wondering what would happen next.

The series seemed to get better with each story as the action heated up and I felt like I was right there with Kyle and Andy as they raced against time. The author had this way of throwing out clues that seemed to lead to the wrong path but then they all converged to form a picture at the end that hadn’t even occurred to me.

It seemed like the romance in their relationship was heating up too. I wasn’t sure how I felt about that. I was finding myself getting just as involved in their relationship as I was with the action. If my father had any idea that I was reading books like this, he would’ve rolled over in his grave.

Last night when I was reading, Kyle and Andy had finally shared their first kiss. I’d felt guilty reading about it so I’d switched off the Kindle and drifted off to sleep. This morning when I’d woken up, I’d thought about the story again and was mad at myself for not finishing it. Did it really matter what my father would have thought? Why did I still let his opinions affect me so much?

My musings were interrupted by the phone ringing. By lunchtime, I’d made up for my earlier slacking. Remembering that I’d planned to go to Perkfections for lunch, I locked my computer, grabbed my keys and drove into town.

When I arrived, there was quite a crowd outside. I glanced around the tables as I walked up, looking for Eddie. I couldn’t see him so when I walked in I was hoping he would be inside. He was walking up behind the refrigerated display and looked up when the door opened. For a moment, we just stared at each other. Instantly, I felt a thump in my chest as my heart started racing and it felt like a thousand butterflies were fluttering around in my stomach.

“Hi Mike, you came back!”

“Hi Eddie,” I replied nervously and briefly forgot why I was even there. My mouth felt dry and I licked my lips and then swallowed, standing there, stupidly staring at him until someone bumped into my back as they walked by and that propelled me into action.

I walked up to the display, looking down at the selections behind the glass.

“See anything you like?”

I glanced back up at him and saw his curious expression. I felt a blush rise to my cheeks and mentally cursed myself for my awkwardness.

“Uhm, I’ll just have a club on white,” I replied.

I watched as he made the sandwich, his movements quick and efficient as he walked back and forth, slicing the meat and cheese. I heard someone walk up behind me and suddenly realized that I should move over to the register.

As I walked over, I noticed the selection of pre-made sandwiches and wished I’d just grabbed one of those. I’m sure Eddie was tired from having to fix food for this crowd and I’d just picked out one of the most time consuming sandwiches to make. It didn’t take him long and by the time I’d picked out a bag of chips and paid for my order, it was ready.

“Hey, I have a break in a few minutes, I’ll come out and join you,” he said as he handed me the plate.

“Sure. That would be great!”

***

That evening as I was fixing a light dinner for myself and making Sadie’s food, I thought about the conversation with Eddie again. I had sat there eating my lunch, anxiously watching the door, waiting for him to come out. I’d almost finished by the time he arrived and by then I’d decided that he hadn’t gotten his break.

He’d walked up and sat down, lighting up a smoke. This time when I saw him, the nerves had quelled considerably and I relaxed even more as we began to talk. I asked him about the series and how he’d discovered Gray Wilson. He’d avoided answering the question at first and asked me what I’d thought about the books. I rambled on for a while and when I’d finished, he had a guilty look on his face.

“Mike,” he’d said, “I have a confession to make. I’m Gray Wilson and I wrote those books.”

I’d felt shocked when he told me and I still felt surprised at his revelation. We didn’t have a chance to talk long since he was called back inside but before he left, he told me he would be there Saturday morning and hoped I’d join him so that we could talk more about it.

I was looking forward to talking to him again. After my initial surprise, I was excited that he was the author. I’d always wanted to talk to an author and I couldn’t think of one I’d rather talk to more than him. Eager to finish the latest instalment, I stood in the kitchen and ate with Sadie, leaving the dishes in the sink.

I grabbed my Kindle from my room and Sadie and I went outside. While I sat on the deck reading, she ran around chasing birds and sniffing the ground for anything interesting. By the time I had finished, Sadie had curled up in my lap and it was starting to get dark. I sat her down and we went inside. I was feeling agitated and restless so after washing the dishes, I emptied out the refrigerator and cleaned it. As I cleaned, I kept thinking about what I’d just read.

When I’d stopped last night Andy and Kyle were just kissing but it had progressed beyond that and they ended up jacking each other off. As I was reading the scene, I found the idea exciting and instantly felt guilty at the thought. Luckily, it was a short scene and they got right back into the action. There was a difference in their relationship now as if finally admitting their feelings had made them even more the dynamic duo.

I finished putting the food back in the fridge, throwing a few things out and adding items to my grocery list. I felt better but still restless and although it was approaching the time to go to bed, I just couldn’t settle. I went into the office, checked my email and saw a brief message from Christie. She’d called when she first arrived but since then had only sent emails telling me about her trip.

In tonight’s message, she’d written that she had found an apartment. I wasn’t too surprised because when she made up her mind about something, she didn’t waste any time doing it. I generally took my time about deciding anything, weighing up all the pros and cons. I dashed back a reply, telling her how I was happy for her … and I was, but I still felt heavy-hearted at the thought that she would be moving out soon and everything would change.

I was starting to feel somewhat depressed and then remembered that I’d wanted to find a gourmet cooking class. I searched and found one fairly close. They had a new eight week course starting next month so I quickly signed up for it. Feeling better about my situation and starting to get tired, I logged off and headed for bed.

As Sadie and I got into bed, I started thinking about all the different things I could do. My life was changing and I was starting to feel excited, thinking about my future. I’d clung to the pain of the past for far too long and had let it affect my life, essentially keeping me frozen. As I drifted off to sleep, I thought about Eddie and wondered again if he played tennis. I would have to ask him when I saw him on Saturday.

***

“Uhn, uhn, oh, God ....” I ground myself up into him, my hands squeezing his ass and pulling him tightly against me, his weight over me, the warmth of his skin against mine, our lips hungrily eating at each other’s mouths. Slowly I felt it drifting away and I could feel the covers over me and was vaguely aware that I was lying in my bed. My cock was painfully hard, my balls drawn up, aching for release. I slid my hand down into my briefs and griped it, stroking the foreskin over the head ... once, twice and then my cum surged up and my orgasm overtook me. As the waves rolled over my body, I could feel his lips on mine and then they disappeared as the waves receded. Laying there, floating in the darkness, I languidly released my softening dick.

I become more aware of my surroundings and then heard Sadie running towards the bed and felt it move as she jumped up. She snuggled in by my side and I started to drift back to sleep.

Eddie. It was Eddie I realized, my eyes popping open, suddenly wide awake. I wanted him. I wanted to run my hands over his body, to rub my face against his skin, to kiss every square inch of it. I wanted to smell him, feel him and taste him; the craving for him setting my entire body on fire.

Then all of a sudden it was like something clicked in my brain. My mind started reeling, my heart racing, my entire body shaking as I broke out in a cold sweat. This can't be true. A multitude of images came into my mind and I ticked through them rapidly: Shannon, sitting across from me at school with his doe eyes and perfect white teeth; Rusty, the rebel and the dyed red streak in his hair; my gym teacher, Mr. Collins in tight shorts and his hairy legs; the football player's pert round ass as he was in the shower; my father standing over me, the spittle on his mouth, yelling down at me that he was not going to have a fucking fag for a son; my mom's look of shame and the tears rolling from the corners of her eyes as she lay in the bed. My stomach suddenly felt sick and I thought I was going to throw up.

I tried to take a deep breath but it felt like my lungs were seizing up and I couldn't get enough air. I tried forcing myself to relax, my muscles tensed up, my hands in fists. Every hair on the surface of my skin was electrified and standing up, my breath coming in shallow pants. My mind just kept whirling and I was spinning out control, feeling that, at any minute, my brain would splinter.

Sadie nudged her nose under my hand and I frantically started rubbing down her back over and over. Gradually, I felt the weight began to lift from my chest and the air fill my lungs. Breathing in deeply through my nose and blowing it out of my mouth, I relaxed and my heart beat slowed. I shivered as the sweat on my body started to cool. Concentrating on taking normal breaths and keeping my mind blank, I felt Sadie move under my hand. She crawled up to my face, stood up, then leaned down and licked my nose.

As I felt her wet tongue, I choked out a half-laugh, half-cry and reaching up, rubbed her ear. She sat back on her hind legs, looking at my anxiously. "It's okay, baby girl, Daddy's okay," I crooned to her. In a way, it was okay, like a great weight had been lifted but I still felt like a survivor in the middle of a tornado that had swirled around me; the black vortex taking everything, leaving me standing alone on barren ground.

The emotions were swamping my body. One moment I felt giddy and the next, I felt like crying. Sadie lay back down and I resumed stroking her slowly, my mind still wanting to race. I latched onto the quiet noise of the air blowing through the vents and focused on it. Eventually, I felt my mind relax but the taste in my mouth was metallic and so dry that my tongue clung to the roof of my mouth.

"Let Daddy get up, baby girl," I said to Sadie, tugging on the covers. She stood up and walked to the end of the bed and plopped down. I pulled the covers back and swung my legs over the side and sat there for a few seconds, feeling a little dizzy. Walking into the bathroom, I switched on the light and felt a mild shock when I saw myself in the mirror. I'd almost expected a different man to be looking back at me.

I turned on the faucet, cupping my hands underneath the water, greedily scooping it up into my mouth and it seemed like I couldn't get enough. With the last scoop, I splashed it over my heated face, reaching down blindly to turn off the faucet. Reaching out, I grabbed for my hand towel and buried my face in it for a moment. As I slowly lifted my head, drying my face, I met my eyes in the mirror. "You're gay," I said out loud.

At first I felt my heart thump and the panic start to come back as I stared at myself. Then I just kept repeating it over and over and finally I laughed out loud. "You're gay," I said a final time in a gleeful tone and, looking at myself laughing in the mirror, made me laugh even harder. Then the laughter quickly turned to tears and my guts felt like they had been wrenched out. I sat down quickly on the lid of the toilet seat. Leaning over with my head in my hands, I sobbed out the last dregs of the lie.

All these years, all these miserable, painful years of denying myself, avoiding the truth and locking down all of my emotions. The memories rolled through my mind and each emotion they wrought swamped me. The guilt and the sorrow about mom, the hope that my father would love me, the fear and confusion, the disappointment and sorrow and the dead feeling as my mind shirked away from the truth.

I cried until I was utterly exhausted and finally stood up when I felt the urge to pee. Realizing how sticky and nasty I felt with the acrid smell of my stale sweat making me feel nauseous, I reached into the shower and cranked on the tap, stepping in once the water had heated up.

As I ran the washcloth over my body, I felt different. For the first time in years, I felt connected to myself and this sense of completion swamped me. I felt whole in a way I’d never felt before and blissfully at peace with myself. As I dried off, I was still marveling over the wondrous feeling. I brushed my teeth and padded back into the bedroom, getting back into bed without even bothering to put on clean briefs. Sadie snuggled up beside me and we drifted back off to sleep.

Chapter 8 – Eddie

Sitting at the table just staring at my laptop screen, I was relieved when Mike finally drove up. I’d been trying to write but I just kept wondering what he was going to say or if he would even show. I hated leaving him like that the other day and his reactions had made me feel bad for not having been honest with him up front.

“Hi, Eddie, are you writing?” he asked as he walked up, smiling.

“Hi, Mike, I’ve been trying to but I’m having a little writer’s block,” I replied, shutting the lid on the computer.

“I’m going in to get a coffee and a pastry; do you need a refill?”

“I’ll go in with you.”

I grabbed my almost empty cup and walked in with him. I was puzzled by his demeanor; it felt different. He seemed more relaxed and confident.

We ordered our coffees and picked out something to eat, talking casually about our week and the weather as we waited for our orders. After we went back outside and sat down, he asked me when I’d first started writing.

“I used to be an auditor for Ernst & Young and I travelled a lot. One night I was reading this book ... I don’t even recall the name of it or who wrote it but I know it was a best-selling author at the time. It was so poorly written with holes in the plot a mile wide, I remember thinking, ‘I could do a better job at writing this story myself’.”

“So did you rewrite it?”

“I started to but then had some other ideas and before I knew it, I’d written my own story. My first draft probably wasn’t too much better than the book that had gotten me started in the first place,” I replied, chuckling at the memory of my attempt.

“So where do you get your ideas? I always wonder where the idea came from when I read a book.”

“They come from various places. Sometimes they’re prompted by a book I’ve read and I think of how it could’ve been written differently. A lot of the ideas are just from the times I’ve had traveling, observing people, listening to their stories or sometimes it can be as simple as seeing an image. It could just be a particular situation, like this, two guys meeting at a coffee shop. That could make for an interesting story.”

“What kind of story would you imagine about our meeting?” he asked curiously.

Shifting uncomfortably in my chair, I wasn’t sure how to respond. What I wanted to tell him - and knew I shouldn’t – was at that moment I could imagine him sweeping everything off of the table and bending me over it. As I looked at him, I wondered for a second if he’d read my thoughts. His eyes seemed to have darkened and he swallowed hard then licked his full lips and quickly reached for his coffee.

“I ... I don’t know. Maybe two guys meet, each holding a vital clue that will solve an old mystery and during their conversation they realize it. Perhaps whoever solves it first gets a reward and this creates a conflict between them.”

That felt like a safe response and he nodded back as if he was picturing it. I picked up my pastry, taking a large bite, stalling for time. I wasn’t sure what to expect today but I wasn’t expecting to feel such an overwhelming desire for him. I’d been attracted to him from the start but today I felt like my body had gone into overdrive. I watched him as he picked up his Danish, sinking his perfect white teeth into it and imagined my tongue running over them. Needing to get a grip and quit staring at him, I shifted in my seat and looked across the street, observing someone opening up the florist shop for the day.

“Would they be gay?” he asked quietly.

I turned quickly to look at him, surprised by his question. The blush was back on his cheeks. He’d glanced down as soon as I’d met his eyes and he was toying with his Danish.

“Probably; I’m gay and most of the stories I write feature gay characters. Why do you ask?”

The blush was getting deeper and the thought crossed my mind about how he must look when he was flushed with arousal and getting ready to cum.

“I ... no reason really. It’s just that Kyle and Andy are and I was just curious,” he said, picking up his coffee and taking a sip.

It felt like he was getting ready to say something else but had changed his mind. For a moment, I thought he was going to admit that he was gay too. His behavior was baffling and so were my reactions to him. Not only was my body reacting to him but so was my mind. Instinctively, I felt like I could trust him but my past mistake with Peter was battling with those instincts. I didn’t want to once again build up something in my mind that wasn’t there.

“So what prompted the idea for Out of the Shadows?” he asked after setting his cup back down.

Relieved that he’d changed the subject, I replied, “The idea came to me when I was living in New York. There was a small little coffee shop I went to every morning before work. Every day these two guys came in and I would catch bits and pieces of their conversation. Apparently they were detectives for the NYPD. It struck me one morning when I was listening to them that this could make a good story.”

The detective series was my first series and I loved talking about it. Just as I was getting into the conversation, Eric walked up.

“Hello, darling,” he said, leaning over to give me a quick hug.

“Hi, Eric,” I replied, hugging him back.

Then he looked over at Mike and put his hands on his hips and cocked his head to the side. “Well, what do we have here? Eddie, you’ve been holding out on me, he’s hot with a capital ‘H’!”

I was watching Mike’s reaction and at first he looked a little stunned and then he chuckled and put out his hand, saying, “I’m Mike; I’m just a friend.”

“Oh no, we don’t do handshakes, we do hugs,” Eric said, opening his arms.

Mike stood up and hugged Eric and instantly I felt jealous when I saw Eric pulling Mike in so tightly against him. I hadn’t even casually touched Mike and there was Eric looking like he was getting ready to hump his leg. Fortunately, it didn’t last long and Eric pulled out a chair and they both sat down. Eric leaned in towards Mike, propping his arm on the table and resting his chin on his hand.

“So tell me, Mike - just a friend - what are your intentions towards Eddie?”

Mike’s mouth gapped open and he definitely looked shocked at the question. I shot daggers at Eddie and resisted the urge to smack him although I was curious as to how Mike would respond.

He glanced quickly at me and back at Eric. “I’m not trying to come between you two if that’s what you mean.”

Eric and I both laughed and Eric said, “Oh no, honey, he’s not my type. I prefer my men with muscles like yours.” He reached over, touching and squeezing Mike’s bicep.

I was expecting Mike to act nervously like he had with me, so was surprised when he simply smirked and flexed his bicep. Now I was really feeling jealous and slightly pissed at Eric for hitting on him.

“Oh yeah, nice. You must work out a lot,” Eric simpered, giving a final squeeze before letting go of Mike’s arm.

“I have some equipment set up in my basement that I use although not as often as I should.”

“Often enough, I’d say. You should join the ‘Y’. Of course, I just go to check out all of the eye candy.”

“I’ve been thinking about it. The one on Main Street has an indoor pool.”

“So, do you have a boyfriend?” Eric asked.

“He’s married,” I sharply interjected just as Mike started to respond.

“Technically married but we’re not a couple,” he corrected. Then he started blushing again and looking down at the table, he added quietly, “and no, I don’t have a boyfriend.”

Eric made a show of glancing at his watch and then said, “Well, my darlings, I need to get to work. Tons of things to do today. Have fun!”

He got up and walked in and I turned my attention back to Mike. He’d basically just admitted that he was gay but I was curious about his marriage. How was he just ‘technically’ married?

Chapter 9 – Mike

The curiosity on Eddie’s face was undeniable and I had no idea how to explain everything to him or even how to tell him that I was attracted to him. The past few days had been confusing, exhilarating, scary and every emotion in between.

I still hadn’t told Christie. She’d gotten in late Thursday night and last night we’d been busy getting her ready for her tournament this weekend. I was relieved that I hadn’t had the chance because I wasn’t sure how she was going to react. I wanted to talk to Eddie about it along with my feelings for him but when I’d had the chance earlier, I’d chickened out. I could feel my anxiety returning so I lit up a smoke and rushed to change the subject.

“You never finished telling me about the detective series. So the two NYPD detectives in the coffee shop talking; that’s what prompted your idea?

“Oh ... yes, we were talking about that.” He paused for a moment and I wondered if he was going to continue our previous conversation or ask me about Christie. He lit up a smoke and I was glad when he started explaining how observing them had made him wonder what challenges they would face if they were also in a romantic relationship. He’d always wanted to write a crime thriller and exploring how the relationship would affect their job, and in turn how the job would affect their relationship, put quite a different spin on it. As he told me about his ideas and the process of writing it, I was just as fascinated by his words as I was with his expressions as he spoke. The energy just seemed to flow from him and wrap me in it.

“Sorry, man, get me started and I won’t shut up!” he finished with a rueful grin.

“Oh no, I love hearing the story behind the story. I had no idea that so much research went into it. I mean, I knew that there was some research but I’d thought maybe authors just knew what they were writing about or made up what they didn’t know.”

“If it’s something that I don’t have first-hand knowledge of, then I research it and sometimes when I’m researching one thing, I stumble onto something else and that gives me more ideas. And yeah, sometimes I just make up stuff too!” Eddie laughed, flicking his ashes into the ash tray.

“You’re certainly a very talented writer. I’ve been obsessed with the series since I read the first one.”

“I still feel bad that I didn’t tell you before that I was the author.”

“You shouldn’t. Besides you didn’t have a lot of time to talk about it since you had to go into work. I didn’t even bother reading the description on Amazon before I downloaded it. Although I often don’t if it’s an author I know or it’s been recommended. Sometimes they give away too much and I would rather be surprised.”

“So were you surprised?”

I wondered if this was a good time to talk to him about my revelation because I had been surprised that the main characters were gay. As I thought about it, it occurred to me that reading the stories may have helped me figure it out. Since that wasn’t what he was asking - and I still felt awkward about it - I wimped out again.

“Definitely! I can’t wait for you to write the next one.”

“You said earlier that you didn’t have a boyfriend. So you and Christie just have an open marriage? She doesn’t mind?” he asked.

“Christie and I are just close friends and have been since our first day of college.”

“Really? You mean you’re married but you’ve never been a couple?” His expression was dubious.

This was my chance to finally talk to him but I wondered how in the world I would explain that I hadn’t realized that I was gay at the time. I still didn’t even know myself how I could’ve suppressed it. I told him the story of how it all started between us, how we’d ended up married, realized that the sex was too awkward so decided to just live together as friends.

“So you’re just going to keep living together and date other people on the side?” he asked when I’d finished.

“We won’t be living together for much longer; she’s moving to Scottsdale, Arizona.”

“Why Scottsdale?”

“She plays golf and there’s a professional she’s going to be training with and the location is better for her golf career.”

“Golf, huh? I have to admit I’ve never seen the attraction. I played once but didn’t find it all that appealing. Who wants to stand around waiting for their turn to try to hit a ball into a cup?”

I was glad that he’d lightened the tone and replied, “Yeah, I know. I think it’s mind-numbingly boring myself. I used to play tennis. Now that’s a game that actually has some action in it. Do you play?”

“As a matter of fact, I do. Eric and I play on the courts over at Clark High. Of course, that is only when I can get him to go with me. He claims he only likes to sweat if there’s going to be a happy ending!”

I chuckled and could just imagine him saying that. “Would you like to play sometime? It’s been awhile for me so likely I’m pretty rusty,” I admitted.

“That sounds like a great idea. Rusty or not, I’m sure you won’t complain about the sweat as much as Eric.”

“True,” I replied, laughing.

“That sounds like a plan then,” he said, picking up his coffee cup. He looked down into the cup, frowning. “I think I’ve had enough coffee. Do you want to walk down to Riverview? I need to stretch my legs and it’s starting to get busy out here.”

I’d been so focused on him that I hadn’t even noticed. We picked up our trays and he put his computer into his bag, saying he would leave it in Eric’s office.

We went inside and we both had to take a leak. This time I think he was definitely sneaking a peak at me while we were at the urinals. He was gone when I walked out of the bathroom but quickly reappeared minus his bag. We bought a couple bottles of water to take with us and headed out.

Chapter 10 – Eddie

We walked to Riverview which was the start of a paved trail that followed along the riverbank. I’d walked along this trail many times, trying to resolve something in a plot or just to leave my apartment for a while and get some exercise.

Mike seemed deep in thought and I was thinking about what he’d told me about his marriage. It seemed like a strange situation and I wondered if he’d stayed with Christie because he was afraid of commitment in a real relationship. It was obvious that he really loved her and it almost seemed worse than the situation with Peter. He didn’t even like his wife and yet I still wasn’t enough for him.

We walked along silently at first and then he asked me what it was like to live in New York. Our conversation drifted to talking about the various places I’d travelled to for work and before I knew it, we had reached the end of the path. On our way back, I asked him where he’d travelled.

“I’ve never been out of the U.S. before. Christie and I have taken a vacation in Florida twice, once in Miami and once in Tampa and then there was Las Vegas where we got married but that’s about it as far as my travels.”

His mention of Christie again and where they got married was like a cold douse of reality. The more time I spent with him the stronger my attraction grew; hearing her name was distracting, almost annoying.

Realizing that I had gone quiet, I asked him if his parents had taken him on any vacations when he was kid.

When he started telling me about his childhood and how his mother was always sick, I felt badly for having asked and causing him to drudge up the memories. I could see now why he’d acted so shy and awkward when we first met. It didn’t seem like he’d ever had a chance to socialize with other kids and just be a kid himself. His father sounded like a real asshole and I couldn’t imagine what it must have been like to live in that situation. He’d really had a hard time of it.

I reached out and gave him a hug and he hugged me back, tightening the grip and prolonging it. I think he was struggling not to cry. Although I was simply offering him comfort, I couldn’t help but luxuriate in the feeling of his arms around me and his body tight against mine.

When we parted, he looked embarrassed and was starting to blush and get fidgety again.

“Eddie, can I tell you something else?”

“Of course, let’s sit down and relax for a minute,” I suggested, walking towards a nearby bench.

We sat down and he leaned forward resting his elbows on his knees, the bottled water dangling from his fingers.

“I’ve never been with a man before. I just figured out I was gay a few days ago,” he admitted, looking quickly at me then back down at the ground again.

At first I was surprised but then it sort of made sense. He’d led a sheltered life and then hooked up with Christie as soon as he’d left home. Although it still seemed strange that he hadn’t realized he was gay before now. He looked really nervous so I reached out and rubbed his back and asked the first question that came to mind, “Are you sure?”

“I’m sure,” he replied, looking over at me again. “I’m very attracted to you.”

My hand stopped in its tracks as I quickly processed what he’d said.

“I feel the same way about you, Mike,” I admitted.

I removed my hand as he leaned back on the bench and blew out a shaky breath, running his hand through his hair.

“I ... I don’t have a clue how to do this,” he blurted out, “I’ve never dated anyone before.”

“It’s okay, Mike, we just take it one step at a time, get to know each other better and see what happens,” I replied, giving him a reassuring smile.

Just then my stomach gave a loud rumble and we both laughed. Looking down at my watch, I realized that it was well past lunchtime.

“Let’s go get something to eat. All of this walking has made me hungry,” I suggested.

We decided on Joe’s Crab Shack, a restaurant that floated on the river and was within walking distance. We asked to be seated in a secluded spot on the deck and after we’d placed our orders, we starting talking about the various foods we liked and then Mike mentioned that he loved to cook.

“Marry me,” I said, laughing, “I hate to cook and if it wasn’t for the leftovers at the coffee shop, I would starve!”

“I would love to cook for you. In fact, I’ve signed up for a cooking class where they teach you how to make gourmet meals. It’s like a trial version of a culinary school like Le Cordon Bleu just not nearly as expensive!”

Our meals arrived and once the waiters had left, he asked me when I’d first realized I was gay.

“I’ve always known. When I was about six, I remember one of my mom’s friends teasing me about having a girlfriend. I said that I didn’t want a girlfriend, I wanted a boyfriend! I remember her look of shock but at the time, I didn’t pay much attention to it. My mom talked to me about it later. She told me that it didn’t matter who I liked but since most boys liked girls it made me different. She was worried that I would get beat up at school and I know she’s always been concerned about people being intolerant. I was lucky to grow up with parents like mine. They never once made me feel bad about it or try to convince me to be any different. I had it much, much easier than most kids.”

Mike took a sip of his tea, looking deep in thought for a moment then he said, “I think I may have realized it at one point. I’m just not sure. I just remember my father was always yelling at me and telling me I need to man up and quit being a sissy and the one time he got so angry and said he wasn’t going to have a fag for a son.”

“God, Mike, that must have been rough. I couldn’t imagine growing up you like you did. I don’t understand how parents can treat their children that way. Who we’re attracted to is not a choice; we have no more control over that than we do the color of our eyes. It’s just the way we were born. I’ve never understood why some people just can’t accept that.”

The waiter interrupted us, checking to see if everything was okay and we switched to lighter topics. When we’d finished eating, Mike grabbed for the check.

“At least let me pay for my half,” I argued.

“No worries, I got it. Got to support the starving artist now, don’t we?”

I laughed, admitting that I wasn’t exactly starving since I still had a lot of savings from when I’d worked full time and said I’d definitely get the next one. We headed back to the coffee shop where Mike had left his car, both agreeing that we needed to head home. I was hoping the edits were back from Danielle and Mike said he needed to get home to his dog, Sadie.

The conversation stayed light as we walked back. Mike pointed out old buildings that had been renovated and the recent improvements that been made to the town.

“I do love it here. It’s so easy to take things for granted until you’re faced with the choice of moving. Sharing it with you makes me see it in a different light too, since you haven’t lived here as long as I have,” Mike said as we approached Perkfections.

“Yeah, I fell in love with the town when I came to visit Eric last year. When I mentioned that I was ready to leave New York, settle down somewhere else and spend more time writing, he suggested moving here and I never gave it a second thought. Hey, let’s exchange numbers and we can plan on playing a game of tennis one night next week.”

We exchanged numbers and then looked at each other awkwardly.

“I had a great time talking with you today,” Mike said, reaching out to embrace me and then he tilted his head down, softly placing his lips on mine. It was brief but I could still feel the pressure of his lips once he’d pulled back.

“I’ve wanted to do that all day,” he confessed.

“I’m glad you did,” I replied softy. “Call me about playing tennis? I’ll look at my schedule tomorrow morning and see which afternoons I’m off.”

“I will or why don’t you call me when you get your schedule figured out? I’ll be home all day tomorrow and during the week I usually get home by five.”

“I’ll call you tomorrow night then. Be careful on your way home,” I said, giving him another quick hug before heading into the coffee shop.

When I got to the door, I turned back and watched Mike getting into his car. He gave me a wave and then pulled out. I walked in and went back to talk to Eric. I didn’t know whether to thank him for his interference this morning or smack him for hitting on Mike.

Chapter 11 – Mike

Christie was due back soon and I had cooked her favorite combo of fried chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy, fried okra and spinach casserole. Last night and this morning I’d relaxed, downloading and reading several of Eddie’s romances. They were funny, sweet, and sexy and I’d thoroughly enjoyed them. Through his stories I’d gotten to know him even better and I could hardly wait to talk to him again.

Christie arrived home excited about her game and after she’d had a quick shower, we sat down to eat. I knew I couldn’t avoid telling her any longer so when she’d finished talking, I took a deep breath and told her about what had happened the other night.

“Jesus, Mike, really? I don’t know what to say. Are you absolutely sure?”

“I’m sure I’m gay and to be honest, I’ve never been more certain of anything in my life. It’s like I’m finally who I was always meant to be and it’s a freedom that I’ve never felt before. It could be that the stories had something to do with me finally realizing it or maybe it was just meeting Eddie. I don’t know. Maybe the fact that you’re moving and so much is changing made me finally face up to the truth.”

“Wow! I have to admit that I didn’t see this coming.”

“Are you okay with it, Christie? Are you okay with me?”

“Of course, honey, I’ll always love you no matter what. It’s just going to take some time to wrap my head around it.”

After we’d finished eating, she went to her room, saying that she was tired. I cleaned up and sat outside with Sadie for a while.

I was trying to recall what had led up to my father being so angry that night. I remembered standing there and him yelling and how I'd felt so scared. He'd walked away and I'd run to mom's room and when I looked in, she was crying. I'd fled to my room, feeling so guilty and full of shame.

It was that morning … that was when we'd met with the doctor and he'd said her cancer was back and there were no more treatments that he could do. It was my fault, I'd thought. But why would I think that? I had done everything I could for her. I'd even made trips to the library to read through their medical books to see if there was something the doctor had missed. Finding nothing, I would feel so defeated with every step on the way back home.

Had I blamed myself for causing it to come back? Had it been the stress of the situation that had made me stuff down my feelings and forget them?

I didn’t have any answers to these questions and when Eddie called, I was relieved to put them out of my mind.

Eager to talk about the romances I’d just read, I asked him for the background of each story. It was so interesting to find out how he’d come up with his ideas.

Our conversation switched to work and he told me some funny stories about several eccentric customers who frequented the coffee shop and I told him stories about my job. Since some of his auditing jobs were auditing the IT Department, he actually understood a lot about what I told him. We talked about our favorite authors and our favorite books and found that we both had read a lot of the same ones.

After a couple of hours, we reluctantly hung up, making plans to meet for a game of tennis after work on Tuesday night. I know I had the goofiest grin on my face as I disconnected and was overjoyed just thinking about the conversation and how much we’d connected.

We’d talked even more last night and during the day had sent each other text messages. I laughed at myself a few times for acting like a young schoolgirl, experiencing her first crush. Only this felt a lot more serious than a crush.

Christie had spent yesterday out on the golf course and when she’d arrived home last night, I was already in bed. She’d called me at work yesterday and we talked for a few minutes but I couldn’t decide if she was upset with me or just preoccupied with her move.

Earlier, she had called, told me she’d rented a U-Haul and asked if I could help her pack and load it tomorrow night. When I’d hung up the phone, it’d really hit me that she was leaving and I was afraid that things would never be the same between us.

Pushing the worry aside, I focused on the program I was writing. I was excited about playing tennis with Eddie tonight. I couldn’t wait to see him!

Chapter 12 – Eddie

“Thinking of you and can’t wait to see you. I hope you’re having an awesome day!”

I quickly read the text and as soon as I finished the order I was working on, I texted back.

“Thinking of you too. See you at 6:00 on the tennis court!”

Danielle had been late in getting the editing changes back and I still hadn’t finished processing them so was glad I only had to work the lunch shift today. I wouldn’t have traded the time I’d spent talking to Mike last night for anything in the world but I was anxious to get this title out to my beta readers.

By four-thirty, it was done and I had emailed it to them. As long as they didn’t find anything that had to be completely changed, there was a good chance that I would have it on the shelf by the weekend. Grabbing the leftover sandwich from lunch that I’d brought home, I scarfed it down as I replied to several emails.

By five forty-five, I’d made the twenty minute walk to Clark High, eagerly waiting for Mike. I watched as his car pulled up and when he got out, he took my breath away. Dressed in shorts and a tank top, he looked magnificent.

He walked up, carrying his racket, a can of tennis balls and a bottle of water. We stood there grinning at each for a few seconds, checking each other out and judging by the look on his face, he liked what he saw too. We reached out and gave each other a hug.

“Are you ready for this?” I asked.

“Yeah, I’ve been looking forward to it all day.”

He set his water down next to mine, popped the plastic wrapping from the can and retrieved the balls. He handed me two, putting the extra in his pocket after tossing his keys and phone on the bench.

“You serve first,” he said.

We walked out on the court and got into position. I was distracted by the muscles in his calves and thighs as he bent forward waiting for my serve. The first went wild and we laughed. I grabbed the extra out of my pocket and, focusing on getting this one right and not staring at him, I put it into play. For not having played in years, he gave as good as he got.

After working up a sweat, we took a break and sat on the bleachers to catch our breath. The evening was gorgeous with a light breeze and it didn’t take long to cool down. I was getting distracted by the tantalizing traces of his scent carried on the breeze, buffeting my cheek, and watching him as he tilted his head back to take a drink. God he was so fucking sexy with a sheen of sweat on his chest, glistening in the sunlight. I realized that I was just sitting there staring and hurried to make conversation.

“So how was your day?”

“Not bad. Since I didn’t have as many meetings, I managed to finish that web service code that I was telling you about last night. Christie called me today and wants me to help her pack tomorrow night. So did you get your editing finished?”

“It’s done and now I just have to wait to hear from my beta readers. Would you like to read it too? I could email it to you.”

“I’d love that!”

We relaxed for a few more minutes and then headed back out onto the court. About five minutes into play, I twisted my ankle and had to call a time out.

“Are you okay?” he asked as I limped over towards him.

“Just twisted my ankle a little.”

He put his arm around me as I hobbled over to the stands.

As I sat down, he kneeled in front of me and started to take off my shoe. I started to resist, insisting that I could do it myself but he gently took control and I just let him do it. He pulled off my sock, running his hands up and down over my ankle. It hurt but the distraction of his touch overshadowed the pain.

“I think it’s just a sprain but it’s going to swell if we don’t get some ice on it. Stay here for a moment.” He got up, taking the rackets, grabbing his keys, phone and our water, carrying them to his car.

I started to stand up but groaned when I went to put weight on my foot. He turned back and said, “Hey, I told you to stay there.” I sat back down, gingerly slipping my sock and shoe back on, leaving it untied, grabbing my keys and phone. It was a good thing that I didn’t have to work tomorrow.

He came back and helped me up, putting his arm beneath mine, practically carrying me to the car. Once we made it to his car, he opened the door and helped me in. I was slightly embarrassed at the attention but I had to admit that I was enjoying it too.

It was a quick drive home and as soon as he’d parked, he came around to help me out. He put his arm under mine, pulling me into his side as we walked up to the building. While we were waiting for the elevator, Mrs. Green walked by, pursing her lips as she saw us together.

“Hello, Mrs. Green.”

She ignored me and continued out.

“What’s her problem?”

“Apparently she doesn’t like gays.”

“Oh.” He frowned at her retreating form, visible through the glass door. “Do you have to deal with that kind of thing very often?”

“Sometimes,” I shrugged, “but you just learn to let it go.”

Once we entered my apartment, he helped me to the sectional, pulling the coffee table away to give us more space. He walked back to my kitchen for ice as I sat down and started to take off my shoes and socks.

“Where are your Ziploc bags?”

“Second drawer down in the cabinet beside the fridge,” I replied and a moment later, I could hear the sounds of the ice clinking together as he filled the bag.

“Damn, Eddie, what do you eat? Your freezer is empty.”

“I know. I told you I hate to cook; now you have the proof.”

“You definitely must let me cook for you sometime,” he said, walking back in as I was removing the back cushions from the sectional and tossing them into a pile on the floor.

“Here let me get those, you need to lie down and elevate that ankle; it looks like it’s already starting to swell.”

I stretched out, snagging a throw pillow to put under my head and he fussed around, putting several under my leg. Then he dropped down to his knees and started packing the ice around my ankle.

“I’m not a complete invalid,” I said, smiling and enjoying the attention. He glanced up at me, absentmindedly rubbing his hand up and down my uninjured leg.

“I know but I enjoy taking care of you. God you’re just so ... so beautiful.”

I was stunned. I don’t think anyone had ever called me beautiful.

“No, you’re the one who’s-”

He quickly crawled up and cut off my words, framing my face with his hands, leaning over to kiss me. My arms went around him as our lips met and he deepened the kiss, gently coaxing my mouth open with the wet slide of his tongue over my lips and then a tentative flick into my mouth. The tender touches lit a fire and I responded eagerly, pulling him in closer and delving into his mouth with my tongue.

He leaned back, tugging at the hem of my shirt so I sat up and he peeled it off. I tugged at his tank, letting him know that I wanted his off too. He quickly pulled it off and I had a brief peek of his muscular chest before he sank into me, resuming the kiss.

“God, I can’t get enough of you.” He started kissing down my jaw, licking and nipping his way down my neck. I wanted to feel all of him against my body. The caress of his hairy chest against my smoother one was setting my skin on fire.

“Get up here!”

“Your ankle … the ice has slid off.”

He stood up, his erection tenting his shorts. As he fussed with the ice, making sure it was sufficiently covering the entire joint, I greedily took in the sight as he leaned over me.

“Fuck the ankle, now come here,” I demanded, opening my arms.

He chuckled softly, bending down to remove his shoes and socks and then gingerly moved over me, careful to brace his weight on his knees and elbows. I pulled him into me, eager to feel his weight. As he resumed the assault on my mouth, I savored the feel of him, the rasp of his chest hair, the hardness of his cock nudging into my upper thigh and the smoothness of his skin as I ran my hands over the rigid muscles of his back.

He rose up, licking a trail down my neck and across my chest, kissing and licking around my erect nipple. He gently started sucking as I strained against his mouth, trying to lever myself up. “Oh, God, harder,” I begged, moving my hand to the back of his neck, pulling him in. He sucked harder and we moaned in unison. Just when it started to feel like it was too much, he let up, giving the bud a quick flick before switching to the other side, diving in open mouthed, sucking and tonguing it at the same time.

The stimulation was going to straight to my dick and I ground up against his hipbone, aching for release. He leaned up, running his hands up my chest and over my throbbing nipples. He looked at me, panting slightly, the pulse hammering in his neck. I wondered why he had stopped and for a brief moment thought that he wanted to back out.

I placed my hands on his. “Are you okay, Mike?”

He blew out a breath and my heart sank, thinking this was too much for him.

“I want to suck you,” he confessed, “but I’ve never done it before and-”

“Oh, God, there’s no way to do it wrong, well, unless you’re not careful with your teeth.”

He stood up, quickly glancing down at my ankle, I assumed to make sure the ice was still in place. I couldn’t believe that he would think about that when I’d forgotten that it was even there.

He reached for the waistband of my shorts and I quickly helped him, awkwardly lifting myself up with my left leg as I pulled them down over my ass along with my briefs. He pulled them down further and I slipped my leg out, leaving them half on. He feasted on the sight and as he stared, he gulped down a breath.

Without any preamble, he dived in, bracing himself on his left elbow, sliding his right hand up to grab the base of my shaft, pulling the foreskin down to fully expose the head. He licked up the center of my shaft, around my ridge and tongued my slit. The teasing of his tongue was driving me mad and finally he engulfed me in his hot, wet mouth.

“Ah, yeah, just like that,” I moaned as he slowly pulled back up and sank halfway back down. He was learning quickly as he sucked and licked, tightening his lips as they passed over my ridge. At this rate, I wasn’t going to last long and I wanted to suck him too.

I moved my hand down, tugging at his shorts and he leaned back and stood up, quickly pulling them down and stepping out of them. My eyes widened as I saw his meaty cock and it looked so much like I had imagined it would; slightly wider at the base, thick and veiny, topped off with a fat mushroom head partly covered with his foreskin. A bead of precum clung to the tip and I was dying to taste it.

“Come here,” I demanded as I awkwardly tried to lift up. I grabbed his cock, pulling back the foreskin, and shivered at my first taste. “Get on top of me; we’ll do it together.” He climbed up on the sectional, gently straddling me and I guided his cock to my mouth as he eagerly resumed sucking on mine.

It was awkward at first, particularly as I was trying to keep my leg still but that was quickly forgotten with all the sensations flooding me. His musky scent enveloped me as I sucked at him, eager to taste more. He grabbed my balls, gently massaging as he noisily sucked; the sensations and sounds of our sucking and moaning quickly bringing me to the edge. As he pumped his hips, I jacked his cock, licking and sucking on the fat head, letting it dip down to fuck my throat.

As I felt my cum rising up, his cock gave a final swell and his cum jetted into my throat. I swallowed it down, squeezing and sucking to taste the final drops, feeling him milking and sucking at mine. When I thought I couldn’t take the suction anymore, he let go, lifting himself up and then turning to collapse beside me, lying on his side.

We lay there trying to catch our breaths and when I shivered, he put his arm over the top of me and his leg over the top of mine.

“Cold?” he asked.

“Hot! That was amazing …”

“Tell me about it; I don’t think I’ve ever cum that hard.”

I smiled, feeling somewhat drowsy as he gently rubbed my chest. He leaned up and over me, gently placing a kiss on my lips.

“I need to check your ankle.”

Reminded of the pain, the ice suddenly started to burn my skin.

He got up and removed the partially melted bag from my ankle and I slowly flexed the joint. There was still a little pain but it was already feeling much better.

“Good; it looks like the ice has done the trick. It barely looks swollen now. You should probably ice it several more times and take it easy.”

“Yes, Doctor Mike,” I said, grinning. He grinned back and padded into the kitchen, his taunt round butt proudly on display. I got up and could hear him draining the water from the bag and refilling it. Putting my weight on the ankle, it gave a little twinge but nothing that was intolerable. I still didn’t want to try to balance my weight on it so I sat down to put my shorts on. I was standing up, pulling them into place when he returned with a couple bottles of water.

“I put the ice bag in the freezer for you to use later. Damn, Eddie, your fridge is almost empty too. Come over Friday night and I’ll cook for you,” he said, handing me one of the bottles, taking a swig from his, before setting it down and grabbing his shorts and tank from the floor.

“I’ll look forward to it; it’s been a long time since I’ve had a home cooked meal,” I replied, unscrewing the cap and taking a drink as I sat back down watching him get dressed. When he’d walked back in, his cock swinging and looking sexy as hell, I’d been tempted to start round two. But it was getting late and I knew he had to be up early for work.

He sat down beside me to put on his socks and shoes and as soon as he was done, he put his arm around me and placed his hand on my cheek, gazing into my eyes.

“God, Eddie ... you’re amazing.” His blue eyes looked at me intently as if he were looking into my very soul. The open sincerity in his face went straight to my heart and unlocked a flood of emotions.

Words that usually came so easily to me when I was writing were locked in my throat. I cupped his face, placing my lips over his and tried to pour every emotion into the kiss. I wanted to climb into his lap, straddle him and get as close as possible. But knowing he had to leave, I broke away and stood up. He followed me up and I got the closeness I was longing for when he pulled me into his arms and we simply hugged as tightly against one another as we could.

“I have to help Christie pack tomorrow after work but I will call you on my lunch break. Don’t forget to ice that ankle and call me if you need any help with anything,” he said as we finally made our way to the door.

“I’ll be fine, Mike, I don’t have to work until Thursday night,” I said laughing, opening the door. He was such a mother hen!

He reached out and gave me another hug and a kiss that quickly turned steamy and threatened our resolve. I pulled back and he reluctantly released me, straightening his spine as if to gather his strength, he then turned and walked out of the door.

“Bye, Mike; careful on your way home.”

“Bye, Eddie.”

I stood there leaning in the doorway and watched as he made his way to the stairs. At the top, he looked back and gave me a little wave. I waved back and shut the door, leaving my hand on it for a minute as if the love of my life had just left.

Could he be the one? I faltered at the thought, still fearful for my heart, but deep down, I had a feeling that he was.

Chapter 13 – Mike

When I arrived home from work, I saw a small U-Haul trailer backed into the drive hitched onto Christie’s car. The reality that she was actually leaving hit me again like a punch in the guts. For a moment, I wondered if I hadn’t made a mistake deciding not to go with her. Then I thought about Eddie and my feelings for him. I knew it was possible that it might not work out between us but I also knew that if it didn’t that I would be okay. For the first time in my life, I felt ready to actually live it and to pursue what would make me happy without hiding behind my best friend.

I parked beside her car and walked in to be greeted by Sadie who was excited by all of the commotion.

There was a stack of boxes laid out on the floor in the living room. I walked back to Christie’s room and she was coming out from her bathroom with a small box in her hand.

“Oh, you’re home. I thought I heard Sadie kicking up a fuss.”

“What do you want me to do?”

“Could you start taping more boxes together? There’s a roll of tape on the coffee table.”

I started assembling the boxes as Sadie alternated between running into Christie’s room and then back to see what I was doing.

“I’ve called for pizza,” Christie yelled in.

“Good, I’m hungry,” I replied, grabbing an armful of the assembled boxes and taking them to her room.

She already had several small boxes stacked on the floor and I walked over and saw that they were not marked.

“What’s in these?”

“Just bathroom stuff.”

“We should label them so you know where to put them when you get to your apartment.”

“Good idea.”

I walked into the office, grabbing a marker and went back to label them.

She had set one of the boxes on the bed and was pulling stacks of clothes from her drawer and filling it. I winced, knowing she was wrinkling them but held my tongue. I no longer needed to worry about her clothes, carefully arranging them in her drawers.

“So what did you do last night?”

I told her about playing tennis with Eddie and chatted about how fantastic he was as I labelled and sealed the boxes shut after she’d filled them.

“Sounds like Mikie’s in love!”

I grinned at her, glad that she seemed back to her old self. The stack was quickly getting larger, so I picked them up, carrying them to the garage.

We continued on as she emptied out her closet, reminiscing as things caught our eye, bringing back memories. A couple of times we both teared up and hugged each other.

The pizza came so we took a break. As I was getting the plates and silverware, it occurred to me that she would need dishes.

“I need to pack up some dishes for you.”

“Oh no; I’m going completely disposable. I’ll probably rarely be home anyway.”

“At least let me set you up with a few things. What about your favorite coffee mug? You’ll need a coffee maker too.”

She relented and agreed on a few things but insisted she wanted to buy herself a new coffee maker. The apartment she’d rented was furnished so besides a small cabinet she had in her room, she didn’t want any other furniture.

“What about a vacuum cleaner ... oh, and you’ll need cleaners, rags, a duster-”

“Mike! I’m not going to clean. You know how much I hate it; I’ll find a service.”

It’s true; she hated to clean and rarely ever cooked. I was worried about how she would take care of herself. In a way, I was feeling rather abandoned like the housewife left with no one to take care of.

“A golf widow,” I laughed. “That’s what I am now.”

“Wouldn’t that be widower?”

We looked at each other and laughed.

“No, you got it right the first time,” Christie choked out.

As we finished our pizza, I looked around noticing a few pictures and mementos that I knew she would probably like to take with her.

“Don’t forget to look through the movies and CDs and take the ones you want.”

As I cleared away the dishes and started packing a few things for her, I started thinking about how I did act like a housewife. Would I play the female role with Eddie? I hadn’t even asked him about what he liked. I wasn’t sure how I felt about being fucked. I hadn’t given that much thought although I’d fantasized about fucking him. The more I thought about him fucking me, the more panicked I felt and realized how much I still didn’t know.

“Just relax, Mike,” I told myself, “most of the characters in his stories are versatile, so he probably is too.”

My thoughts were interrupted by Christie yelling in for me to bring her a couple more boxes.

“I’ve almost got everything. Just another load out to the garage and we can start packing the U-Haul. I want to get on the road by seven which should put me in Tulsa around five.”

She had decided to break up her trip and do a little exploring on her way there.

I looked around at her almost empty room and felt another pang in my heart at the thought that she was really leaving. She threw the remaining stuff in the last box and we carried them all out to the garage. Once we had a good idea of how everything should be stacked, we packed the U-Haul.

“All done,” she said, slamming down the door and securing it with the lock. “I’ll just throw my suitcase in the car tomorrow morning.” Her voice got a little wobbly and I quickly reached out and hugged her.

“God, Christie, I’m happy for you but I’m really going to miss you.”

“I’ll miss you too, Mike.”

We swiped at each other tears, reminding each other of all the ways we could still stay in touch. We went back to our rooms and before Sadie and I went to bed, I sent Eddie a quick text message.

“Thinking of you. Christie is all packed and leaving tomorrow. Hope your ankle is better.

Mike xoxo”

My phone beeped indicating a reply and I smiled as I read it.

“Thinking of you too. Ankle almost back to normal. Can’t wait to see you Friday night! Sleep well and have sweet dreams.

Eddie xoxo”

Sadie snuggled in beside me and I drifted off to sleep. I’m not sure if my dreams could have been classified as sweet but they were certainly erotic and Eddie played a starring role in every one of them.

***

Arriving home from work on Thursday night, Sadie was waiting for me when I opened the door. I’d worried a little that she may miss Christie but she’d always been more attached to me. I gave her some loving and then let her out. The house seemed empty with Christie gone.

I had cooked her breakfast this morning and packed a few light snacks for her trip. It was a tearful farewell and a couple of my co-workers had asked me if I was okay. I had felt a gamut of emotions all day; the sadness at her leaving, excitement about trying life on my own and exhilaration at the thought of seeing Eddie again.

I thought about the coincidence of meeting Eddie right when I was making a decision about my life with Christie. It was moving swiftly with him and I wanted to make sure that I spent some time alone. I didn’t want to be concerned about – or for Eddie to think – that he was a rebound or simply a replacement for Christie. He was so much more than that and my feelings for him were very different to my love for Christie.

Sadie scratched on the door and I let her in, fixing her dinner while I threw together a salad for myself. Taking my bowl into the office with me, I sat down at my computer to check my email. The manuscript from Eddie had arrived, some spam and a notice of an automatic payment made. I downloaded the manuscript and as I ate, I opened it and started reading.

It was a romance titled My First Forever. The main characters where Kevin and Craig. Kevin was experienced but Craig was a virgin and Kevin became his first lover. I was deeply engrossed in the story when Christie called and told me she’d made good time and was already checked into a hotel in Tulsa. We didn’t talk long because she wanted to grab something to eat. I was relieved because I was dying to get back to the story.

The intensity of Craig’s first time and how it felt for Kevin to be so deep inside him as if their two souls had merged into one, had my heart pounding and I craved something that deep in my own core.

I sent Eddie back a quick email before going to bed, letting him know that I loved the story and didn’t see anything that he should change. As I was lying in bed with Sadie snuggled up as usual, I wondered if I would be snuggling with Eddie tomorrow night and if he would mind sharing the bed with a dog.

***

I left work early and stopped by the grocery store on my way home. When I’d talked to Eddie earlier, I’d offered to come pick him up in my car. No need he’d told me, acting slightly mysterious about his mode of transportation. He was arriving at 6:00 and I had a ton of preparation to do.

After letting Sadie out, I started on the dinner. I’d debated on going all out and putting on a big spread but opted for salad, steak and baked potatoes on the grill. I put the steaks in marinade and popped the potatoes in the oven to precook and then got the salad ready, setting it in the fridge. For dessert, I whipped up a layered chocolate pudding parfait and put it in the fridge beside the salad. Then I prepped the coffee maker and set the timer. Between tasks, I let Sadie back in and fed her, hoping that she wouldn’t be a nuisance by begging for food as we ate.

I changed the sheets on the bed feeling optimistic yet a little nervous about what we may do later. Then it was time to get ready and take a shower. This was the awkward moment that I’d been dreading. I’d read about douching in My First Forever but I’d never actually done it before so had no idea what to expect.

It actually wasn’t as bad as I’d anticipated and I felt amazingly clean. I was still hesitant, thinking about whether I would actually enjoy the sex. It seemed like it would hurt but I’d made up my mind that if Eddie wanted to, I was going to do it. Remembering how I’d given him slight whisker burn on Tuesday, I took my time shaving. I finished my shower and then debated on what to a wear. Eddie seemed to dress casually so I went with dark jeans and a teal blue button up shirt that Christie had said brought out the color of my eyes.

I grabbed the potatoes from the oven, taking them outside and firing up the grill. Then I wiped down the patio table and got our plates and utensils ready. Sadie, sensing my nervous excitement, was following me around. About ten minutes before six, I opened the front door, knowing that Sadie would watch out for anyone coming up the driveway.

As I was setting out the toppings for the salad and wondering if I should’ve baked some rolls, I heard Sadie barking and then the sound of a loud engine as a car pulled into the drive. I walked out just as Eddie was getting out of a 1972 shiny red Corvette. It was in pristine condition.

“What? Is this yours?” I was looking between him and the car and although I’d always dreamed of having a vintage Corvette, my eyes settled on him. He looked stunning dressed in black jeans and a black polo shirt.

“It’s mine,” he said as I walked over and hugged him. “I don’t drive it much. It stays in the garage most of the time.”

“Where did you get it? It’s in mint condition!” Having held him for a minute, my attention turned back to the car.

“My father bought it for me for my thirteenth birthday. We stripped it down to the frame and worked on it together for the next four years. I’d left it at home when I started traveling but since my parents recently moved to a retirement home in Florida, I brought it here.”

I walked around admiring the car and he popped the hood showing me the engine. I could tell he was proud of the work he and his father had done although he wasn’t boastful.

I opened the garage door and told him he should pull it inside. It didn’t look like it would rain but I didn’t want to take any chances. After guiding him forward and shutting the door, we walked inside and Sadie came running to greet us.

I wasn’t sure how she would act. On the rare occasions when we’d had company over, Sadie acted shy and scared of them. I was relieved when she and Eddie took right up with each other. She even stayed inside with him when I took the steaks out to the grill. When I walked back in, he was playing tug of war with her and one of her toys. I watched them, smiling, feeling affection for them both. Perhaps she had sensed that we needed time alone because when she got it away from Eddie, she walked over to the rug and laid down, chewing on it.

Eddie stood up and walked over to the sink, washing his hands as I dished out the salad into separate bowls. We dressed our salad, both of us choosing iced tea for our drinks. Grabbing our glasses and salads, we made our way outside and sat them on the table. Eddie sat down and I walked over to man the grill, asking him how he liked his steak cooked. Medium well, just like I did.

“This is nice, Mike. It’s so peaceful out here.”

“It’s one of the reasons I didn’t want to move. I love this place.”

I sat down and as we started on our salads, I told him about the different projects I had worked on around the house, getting up to grab the food off of the grill when it was done. He talked about the various jobs he’d helped his dad with and we both agreed that home remodeling could be challenging yet also very enjoyable.

As we ate, the topics jumped from one to the next. Occasionally, we would go silent and just smile at each other. The connection between us was nearly palpable.

When we’d finished, I took the plates in as he lit up a smoke and I grabbed mine, bringing them out with a couple cups of coffee and the dessert.

“Not quite as good as what you make at the coffee shop but it should go well with the dessert,” I said, setting it down on the table.

“Mike, this has been wonderful. I haven’t eaten this well in a long time.” Eddie reached out and ran his hand along my arm, grabbing my hand and intertwining his fingers with mine.

It felt so nice just holding his hand, being together and talking while enjoying the view of the sun slowly setting. We eventually unclasped our hands to eat our dessert but our hands never strayed far from each other as we drank our coffee and had a smoke. The anticipation ratcheting with a gentle caress of an arm, a stroke down a thigh and promises exchanged with each light touch.

After the sun set, we made our way inside. Sadie was up and Eddie let her out as I put the leftovers in the fridge. He started rinsing the dishes and putting them in the dishwasher. I let Sadie back in and she padded into the living room and curled up in her dog bed.

“Thanks, Eddie,” I said, watching him finish up the dishes.

“It’s the least I could do after that delicious meal you made us. Now come here and let me thank you properly,” he said, grinning, opening his arms to me as soon he’d closed the dishwasher door.

I rushed into his arms and enveloped him in mine. Every glance and every touch we’d given each other this evening had lead up to this moment and I couldn’t wait to get my lips on his. I leaned down, intending to be gentle but as soon as I felt those plush lips under mine, I plunged in. He tasted of chocolate and coffee as I licked in, invading his mouth with my tongue. I couldn’t get close enough and pulled him tighter against me. He was responding just as hotly, mouth spread over mine, sucking and biting at my lips and tongue. When I felt him tugging my shirt out from my waistband, I came to my senses.

“Bedroom,” I panted, grabbing his hand and leading him back to my room. As soon as we crossed the threshold, he frantically started undoing the buttons on my shirt. I reached down to help him but he pushed my hands away and as he cleared the last one, he pulled my shirt down from my shoulders and my arms, trapping me in the long sleeves, effectively immobilizing me. As I was trying to unbutton the sleeves, he put his arms around my waist, grabbing part of the shirt, staying my hands.

“My turn,” he growled, nuzzling into my chest, rubbing his cheek against it and I could hear him inhale my scent. I felt the wet softness of his tongue as he trailed it over my chest, and swirled it around my nipple. I groaned out when the soft touch turned to sucking and the pressure increased. He released one hand from my shirt, running it along my side and up to my chest, massaging the slight mound before gently pinching the nipple between his fingers. The sensations went south, increasing the ache which had been torturing me on and off all evening.

“Eddie,” I pleaded and he released the hold on my shirt only to continue the assault as he squeezed and rubbed my chest, latching onto my other nipple. I was frantically trying to get the buttons undone and I heard the last one pop off as I finally freed myself. I slid one hand around his waist and the other through his hair, tugging on his locks until he relented. I brought his head up to praise his mouth … and still the aching throb would not subside.

Wanting to feel his bare skin, I tugged up on the back of his shirt, running my hand up and down his back when it came free. I tightened my grip in his hair, holding his head still as I sucked on his tongue, pulling his body more tightly against mine. His nails dug into my back as we devoured each other’s mouths. I was lost in the sensation until I felt his head moving back against my hand and his hands pushing against my waist and I released my grip.

His hands went to the front of my jeans to undo the button and it was my turn to push his hands away. “Yours, take off yours,” was all I could manage.

My fingers were shaking as I hurriedly removed my shoes and socks, shucking off my jeans and briefs keeping my eyes on him, watching as he pulled off his shirt, stripping himself of his pants; the beauty of his naked body took my breath away.

No sooner than he’d stepped out of them, we were on each other again, hands everywhere as he guided me back towards the bed. When I felt it hit the back of my legs, I sank down, spreading my legs and he followed, lying on top of me, bracing himself up on his elbows. I grabbed his ass, pulling him tighter against me as his cock slide against mine.

We rutted as we kissed; the delicious sensation making me lightheaded. My heart was hammering out of my chest, my breath was coming short and just when I thought I couldn’t get enough air, he stood up.

“Scoot back,” he said breathlessly, “I want to taste you.”

I started to scoot back and in that brief moment of lost contact, I remembered what I had wanted to happen tonight.

“Wait! I want ...” He stopped his descent onto the bed, looking at me quizzically. All of a sudden I felt nervous and rather foolish for having stopped what we were doing.

Eddie must have sensed my discomfort and climbed up beside me. “What is it, sweetheart? We can do anything you want.”

The term of endearment melted my nervousness and, turning on my side to face him, I told him what I wanted. “I want to feel you inside me ... I want to know what it’s like to be Craig in My First Forever.”

“You want me to be your first?” he asked, reaching out to stroke my cheek.

I moved up and stretched out to open up the drawer in the bedside table, grabbing the bottle of lube and a condom and handing them to him.

“Yes …”

He sat up and looked me straight in the eyes, “It’s going to be amazing … I promise.”

“I did the prep stuff too like you wrote it in the story.”

“I bet that was an experience,” he chuckled.

“It was definitely something I hadn’t done before but it really wasn’t all that bad.”

He set the condom and the lube on the bed as I lay back down and I wasn’t exactly sure what to do next. My nervousness had caused my cock to soften but his was still standing tall and proud.

“Relax,” he said, curling back down and leaning down to kiss me.

I smiled into the kiss. It was gentle and sweet but it didn’t take long for the kiss to turn from gentle to hungry. My dick swelled again as he ran his hand slowly over my chest, down my stomach and along my thigh.

“Turn over.”

I turned over onto my stomach, crossing my arms and laying my head on them as he continued rubbing up and down my back and then over my buttocks.

“I love your ass,” he said, gently squeezing the mounds. I lifted up a little and wondered if this was the part where he would start fingering me. The bed shifted as he got onto his knees and sensing him move to arch over me, I spread my legs and felt the slide of his legs on the inside of mine. I could feel some of his weight and his cock nestling at the top of my butt cheeks. He kissed my ear and then said quietly, “Easy, sweetheart, I’m going to make you feel so good.”

I grinned, thinking that he already was making me feel good. He kissed the nape of my neck and then trailed kisses down my back. His hands went to my buttocks and then he squeezed and kneaded them. I felt his breath on my skin before he planted a kiss on each cheek and I thrust my cock in the mattress at the sensation.

“Lift up …”

I crawled onto my knees, sensing his eyes boring into me as his hands parted my flesh and exposed me. I felt vulnerable and I momentarily panicked until he let out a shuddering breath and said, “Fuck that’s hot.”

His thumbs were rubbing on either side of my hole and then I felt the heat of his breath and a warm wet sensation as he licked along my crack to then circle his tongue slowly around the edge of the opening. Every nerve ending lit up and I groaned, tilting my hips greedily. He gave me what I wanted, tonguing me over and over and I felt the knot relaxing and then tightening under his ministrations. It was as if every nerve in my body was wired into that socket and with each stroke of his tongue, the sensations exploded back up through my entire body.

When I thought it couldn’t get any better, I felt the tip of his tongue dip in and a spasm as I welcomed the intrusion. His tongue retreated and then plunged in further and every cell in my channel woke up. The sensations were overwhelming and I couldn’t stop moaning, my entire body quaking as he plunged in and out. I was filled as far as he could get and then his mouth tightened down as he sucked the rim, overloading my sensitized nerve endings.

Just when I thought I was going to explode, he backed off. I heard the snick of the cap as he opened the lube and then I shuddered at the cold slide as it dripped in my crack and over my hole. This was followed quickly by the warmth of his fingers as he spread the lube and then I felt him enter me with one finger. I clenched up slightly at the intrusion and he paused for a moment then continued a slow slide in.

It felt different than his tongue. He slid his finger back and forth slowly, twisting with each stroke. I thought I would go mad with the sensation and wanting more, I tilted back into it. Then I felt the fullness and increased pressure in my channel as he stroked in with another finger, curling them to knead my dome. A sensation like I’d never felt before made my entire body quake and a loud groan escaped my throat. I bucked against his fingers, rocking my body up and back, craving more.

“Now! I want you in me now …” I begged and felt his fingers withdraw then the shift of his weight, the sound of the condom wrapper, causing my muscle to quiver in anticipation. I slumped a little, aware of him shuffling forward, getting ever closer; then the head of his cock at my entrance. I pushed back against him, eager to be filled. The fullness as he entered me rent my world apart.

The slow pulse of the thrust was driving me crazy and I rocked my hips back against him, demanding that he go deeper. He gave me everything and we were connected as deeply as we could get. Then he pulled back, quickly plunging back in and began stroking into me with a faster and steadier pace.

I was rocking back and forth, meeting his thrust, a low keening issuing from my throat. My cock was throbbing and the intense desire to cum was overwhelming. He lowered himself against my back, reaching around and grasping my cock. He stroked it, still maintaining short thrusts and I felt the cum rising in my balls; my channel clamping down as my orgasm overtook me. I was insensible as the waves of sensation flooded my body, my cum spurting out and my hole clenching and releasing. I heard him groan and felt his cock thicken and the hot sensation as he filled the condom.

Collapsing under the weight of him, we struggled to catch our breaths and then he kissed my back and levered up, pulling out of me.

“Be right back, sweetheart.”

Feeling leaden, I wondered how he managed to walk into the bathroom. I heard the sound of water running and then he walked back in with a wet washcloth, climbing on the bed. I turned onto my back as he approached and he gently wiped my stomach, chest and spent cock.

“Roll back over.”

I rolled over spreading my thighs as he turned the washcloth and held it against my aching hole, gently swiping to remove the lube. He got up again and I found the energy to pull back the covers and slide my feet under them, listening as the water came back on and the slap of the washcloth as he cleansed himself.

He walked back in, sliding in beside me, pulling the covers up. As he sank down, I stretched my arm out and he curled in beside me with his head resting on my shoulder. I gently kissed his forehead and then tiredly murmured, “That was amazing.”

Before we drifted off to sleep, it occurred to me that snuggling with him was better than I could ever have imagined.

Chapter 14 – Eddie

We spent the entire weekend together, mostly in bed. It was so much better than it had ever been with Peter. Mike was so different and he loved spoiling me. He’d brought me breakfast in bed on Sunday; gone cold by the time we’d finished making love. And it felt like making love and not just getting fucked. He was so gentle and tender that I’d had to beg him to give it to me harder. He quickly learned all the ways to drive me crazy but he taught me how wonderful it felt to really make love.

Over the next several months, we weren’t together all of the time but still talked every day. Mike had insisted on some time apart. At first I’d felt hurt as if he didn’t care about me as much as I cared about him, but then I realized that his desire to be on his own was as much for me as it was for him. He needed to establish his own independence and get to know himself better before he could give himself to me completely.

I was proud of him for his bravery as he tried new things on his own. He was enjoying his cooking class and I enjoyed the results of his efforts. He joined the local YMCA instead of working out at home alone and I enjoyed the benefits of that too. He’d signed up for various classes to discover what he may enjoy and his shyness and anxiety were quickly fading. He was making new friends and even planned a party at his house for our friends.

We went places together and I introduced him to things that I enjoyed. We toured art centers, went to the opera and took in several plays. Sometimes we went out with Eric and that was always entertaining.

He polished up my website and thought of new ideas to help market my books. I even convinced him to start writing and helped him with his first short story. It was a nice story and I think he enjoyed the process but he concluded that he enjoyed helping me with mine more.

I was happy as our relationship deepened. Neither of us had yet said the ‘L’ word but I could feel it in every gaze and touch. Although my initial concerns about his marriage to Christie had faded, I was still relieved when they filed for divorced and celebrated inwardly when it quickly went through.

They still talked often and I met her over Skype. I could see why he loved her. She was a warm and friendly woman and I liked her instantly. Watching their expressions as they talked, I could see the affection they had for each other. His expressions when he looked at me were also affectionate but filled with a passion and intensity that left no doubt in my mind.

The night of the party quickly arrived. I’d never had the same problems chatting with people but I understood why he had. I was happy to see him holding his own as he mixed and mingled with our friends. Our only interaction during the event was when we both met up in the kitchen to bring out more food.

“Having fun?” I asked him as I gave him a quick kiss.

“Yeah, I am. You know Christie had a party once and I ended up going back to my office and reading because I felt so uncomfortable trying to talk to anyone. Tonight I feel different like I can just be myself and I’m not so worried that I will say something boring or stupid.”

“Sweetheart, I’ve never thought you were boring or stupid, quite the opposite in fact. I’m proud of you for breaking out of your shell. Now get these out there before everyone wonders where you’ve disappeared to.”

He smiled, leaning over for another kiss then went back outside with another platter of hors d'oeuvres, much to everyone’s delight. I stayed inside for a few minutes thinking about how much he’d changed. Living on his own was good for him and I wondered if my desire to live with him would be the best thing for him.

After everyone had left for the evening, we cleaned up. Sadie had been sequestered to the bedroom and was eager to get out and sniff around for any food that had been dropped. Between the three of us, we got it all sorted and back into shape.

Lying in bed together later, we gently kissed. We both felt exhausted after the long day and although my dick was up for it, I knew we needed our rest. He pulled back and looked at me intently and I could tell he had something on his mind.

“Eddie, I love you and want you to move in here with me. We can set up Christie’s old bedroom as an office for you.”

I was stuck on the ‘I love you’ part and barely comprehended the rest.

“Oh God, Mike, I love you too,” I replied and reached out, pulling him closer, getting lost in our kiss.

“Does this mean you will?” he asked after we’d pulled back to catch our breaths.

“Will what?”

“Move in here with me.”

“Do you think it’s best? Being on your own has been so good for you. Look how much you’ve changed and the friends you’ve made.”

“Oh, Eddie, it’s because of you, not living on my own. You’ve given me the strength and the desire to be that person.”

“Sweetheart, you’ve always been a wonderful person. You never had to change for me.”

“I know that now but could never recognize it before. I still felt like that shy, awkward kid who never fitted in. Not with you,” he added seeing my expression. “You always made me feel confident with myself. I just needed to learn to be confident with everyone else. You made this happen, your acceptance of me and your love for me ... I’ve never felt more cherished in my life.”

I wrapped my arms around him and felt amazed that this beautiful man loved me and I realized how much stronger his love had also made me.

Epilogue

"Oh my God," I exclaimed as I disconnected the call with Christie. I couldn't wait to tell Eddie the news.

We'd been together now for three years and married for two. We'd had to go out-of-state to get married and had a private Justice of the Peace ceremony. We repeated our vows in a lavish ceremony in our back yard attended by friends, Eddie's family, Eric, and of course, Christie.

Eddie and I had joined a local group that lobbied for equal rights and we were getting closer to reaching our goal. Recently a law had been passed so that our marriage was now legally recognized.

Eddie still put in occasionally shifts at the coffee shop but spent more time writing now since his detective series had topped the charts. He'd been approached by a couple different publishing houses but had opted to stay independent and enjoy the freedom that comes with that choice.

I was still a programmer but I too went independent. My confidence had grown to the point where I felt like I could do anything. No longer hiding in someone else's shadow, I'd become the confident and independent person that I wanted to be. Eddie and I were equals but we made each other stronger; our passion never faded and only grew deeper.

We'd adopted another little dog, a boy named Pedro. They both slept with us, Sadie still snuggling beside me and Pedro snuggled in with Eddie. He wasn’t quite as smart as Sadie but she’d taught him to give us our privacy when their daddies needed some alone time together.

We still talked to Christie at least every other week and Eddie had grown to love her as much as I did. We'd gone out to visit her several times and even took a cruise together last year. She was doing great with her career and she still complained about Becky who did seem to show up at every competition that she was in. She'd tried dating some but they always seemed to turn out disastrous so this piece of news was going to blow Eddie's mind.

"You are not going to believe this!" I exclaimed as I walked into Eddie's office.

He paused his typing and swung around, giving me his attention. "What's she gotten into this time?"

"She's getting married!"

"Married? I thought she said that Phil was a looser and she wasn’t going out with him again."

"Oh no, it's not Phil … this is the shocking part … it's Becky!"

"Becky? As in Becky the competitor that she loves to hate?"

"Yes, that Becky … apparently there is a fine line between love and hate!"

"Oh my God!" He leaned back in his chair, looking as shocked as I'd felt.

"So, what are the chances," he mused.

"Chances?"

"Yeah, the chances that you two were married to each other and then you both turned out to be gay?!"

"I imagine about as good as you discovering that you love playing golf and leaving me a golf widow again!”

"Anyone for tennis?" he replied, drawing me in, knowing the score.

About the Author

I have been an avid reader all of my life, primarily reading fiction in the mystery/suspense, fantasy and m/m romance genres. Having switched to predominantly reading eBooks, I've discovered many self-published writers. One of my favorites is Alp Mortal. I contacted him via his website to ask about one of his books and after exchanging a few emails with him, I mentioned how I always thought it would be fun to write fiction. He urged me to try it and even gave me an idea from which The Golf Widow was born.

It has been an exciting and rewarding experience. I encourage everyone to try it for themselves. I've always appreciated the skills and talent it takes to write fiction but never realized the extent of the challenges and how thought-provoking it is compared to business writing. This experience has definitely given me a new perspective and an even greater appreciation for the craft. It's been so enlightening and exhilarating; now that I've started, I can't stop. I've already started on my next story!

I welcome and appreciate all feedback and comments. Please drop me an email at ShannonMKirlkland@gmail.com and you can visit my website at ShannonMKirkland.weebly.com.

Thanks and happy reading!

Shannon

Please check out The Carter Seagrove Project. This is a creative workspace created by authors Alp Mortal and Chambers Mars for artistic collaboration with anyone. The Carter Seagrove Project contains a Boutique where the artist's works can be obtained; a bi-monthly newsletter called The Window on the Workshop containing serialized stories, poems, drawings, new release information, recommendations and fun facts; and a forum to share ideas and thoughts including a monthly discussion on the author's work. The Carter Seagrove Project is an awesome website for collaboration between authors and readers giving us all the freedom to choose.

Table of Contents

Dedications

Acknowledgements

Chapter 1 – Mike

Chapter 2 - Eddie

Chapter 3 – Mike

Chapter 4 – Eddie

Chapter 5 – Mike

Chapter 6 – Eddie

Chapter 7 – Mike

Chapter 8 – Eddie

Chapter 9 – Mike

Chapter 10 – Eddie

Chapter 11 – Mike

Chapter 12 – Eddie

Chapter 13 – Mike

Chapter 14 – Eddie

Epilogue

About the Author